Things That Are Saving My Life Right Now

I did one of these posts back in May. A post dedicated to a select few things recently that have really stepped in to save my life! Here are my go-to's the last few months.

1-Sudoku - This summer was F.U.L.L. So full that I found it absolutely necessary to quiet as much noise around me as possible. Reading was hard. It's always been hard for me to read when people are around. Voices and movement can be super distracting and that can (not always) lead to frustration because I keep having to re-read things. I was also finding it hard for my brain to stay focused. After coming off of a busy season and stepping into summer, and all that comes with that, I decided I was going to give myself permission to just be. But I also like to be "doing" something and I found the PERFECT thing! 

Solving things + Numbers = Life Giving

Sudoku has been SO fun! I can jump in a game and be interrupted without feeling like I have to spend 20 minutes to get back in the zone. It has nothing to do with technology. I can be present with my family while also keeping my brain active and sharp, and also giving my hands something to do while just hanging out.

2-White Out - We make plans, then the times change, they get cancelled, then rescheduled, then completely moved to another month... I could just write in my calendar with a pencil, but I don't trust that. I could also just cross things out, but when my the little daily white squares on my calendar begin to get cluttered with changed plans being crossed out everywhere my anxiety starts to rise. Enter in this little gem. I can't even count the amount of times I've used this little guy on my homeschool plans or my calendar and IT.MAKES.MY.HEART.SO.HAPPY. It's like a fresh start every times something changes instead of the potential chaotic mess it not only looks like, but actually becomes! Go get you one of these and I promise you won't be disappointed.

3-Juice and Toya - Working out has been sporadic the past few months in between travel and extra littles running around, but I can always count on Juice and Toya to give me a good HIT. Josh and I love to do these workouts together. I mean, we get to work out with another J and T, husband/wife team! Here's the workout I knocked out this morning! Go check them out on YouTube.

4-Puzzles - When we were keeping Josh's sister's kids for a week in August they came with a 300 piece puzzle that the boys would put together, take apart and put together again, over and over. We went to our puzzle arsenal after they left but only had a couple of 1000 piece puzzles, which can be a bit too much for a quick weekend puzzle, so I headed to amazon to pick out a couple 500 and 750 piece puzzles which seemed much more attainable. I love looking over and seeing which of the kids (or adults) gravitate toward the pieces throughout the days.

5-Sabbath Candle - I started using a taper candle on Sabbath. There's just something about finishing the prep of grocery lists, laundry and cleaning chores on Friday morning and then walking over to the table to light the candle to enter into sabbath that is so life-giving to me. As the day goes on I catch myself glancing over at the flickering light, remembering this day as set apart. It also reminds me that I can trust God to still be alive and active even when I am not.

That's it. The things that are saving my life right now. Nothing earth-shattering, just things that keep me centered.

Why Does Nobody Ever Talk About This?

I'm going to share a pet peeve of mine. It really bothers me when I hear someone talk about something that they are beginning to experience for the first time and say, "why does nobody ever talk about this?" 

We live in what I believe to be one of the most vocal eras of all time. There are SO many voices and words and resources that it is actually nearly impossible to honestly say "nobody ever talks about" ANYTHING.

I was listening to a women's hormone podcast, I know, riveting. The podcaster was recounting a conversation she had with a friend and they were discussing how "nobody ever talks about menopause." And I thought to myself, "I have literally heard the older generation talk about hot flashes and diminishing periods and raging emotions and hormones in older adulthood my entire life". Now, I never really thought too much about it, I just knew it was coming. But because it didn't really pertain to the season of life I was in it was just background noise. Something I recognized but didn't need to deeply take in at the time. But it was there.

I also heard someone say (actually lots of someones, as surprising as it may be) "why does nobody ever talk about how hard it is to raise teenagers?" This one really threw me off. Maybe it's because I was one of those "hard to raise teenagers" and have been waiting for my turn to parent kids like myself since I WAS that teen. Or maybe because I saw my emotionally exhausted mom quietly talking across the room to other teary moms as they waded through the trenches of parenting teenagers together.

But what about when I went through my ectopic pregnancy that could have taken my life, or the adoption holdups in another country? I had never HEARD of an ectopic pregnancy or some of the specifics of what we went through in our adoption. But that doesn't mean they were or are never talked about. 

Here is what I have found to be true:

When something isn't on our radar because life experiences haven't taken us in that particular direction yet, it DOES seem new and unknown. But it's because we haven't NEEDED to know the specifics of them. They haven't even been on our radar yet.

You may not have ever paid attention to the older generation of women furiously waving their fans in church to cool themselves off from hot flashes or been in their friend circles as they discuss the woes of menopause, but they've been there. We just haven't needed to know it all yet. But you better believe I am listening intently now as a 45-year-old! 

So often the fingers get pointed to the lack of guidance we received as we grew up because "nobody ever told me that". But we weren't meant to know everything yet. Our brains (and emotions) would have never been able to handle it all. Sometimes we need to learn as we go and that is what opens the door to what people who have gone before us have already been talking about.

Whenever I am tempted to fall into the, "why doesn't anybody ever talk about this" mentality I use it to remind myself to pause, take a step back and listen. Whether I am seeing something from far off and diving deeper or learning something for the very first time, I can take this pause. Oh there is talking alright. We just have to become good listeners and be gracious for the things we are just now learning.

Cereal Isn't A Bad Word

I have a confession to make.

I don't make breakfast for my kids.

Nope.

I actually haven't since back in the day when I used to puree my own baby food for them.

But I do buy cereal. 

Yup, the "c" word designated for us "lazy mom's" who don't have the capacity to think about adding one more meal to the daily queue. I mean, it's hard enough knowing these humans want to eat dinner EVERY NIGHT. The nerve. And I still ration the cereal to one bowl a day (because large family probs).

But I don't even feel guilty about it.

I've talked before about how we don't go out to eat hardly at all (because large family probs), so I designate my cooking efforts toward dinners. Plus, I know my capacity and it does not include getting up before the kids do just to get them breakfast. I get up for other reasons, but not to whip up a breakfast casserole or anything.

What I HAVE done is equip them with the skills to make their own breakfast. It could include breakfast burritos, omelets or scrambled eggs. They also have other options like yogurt parfaits, oatmeal, toast or protein smoothies. All of which have been added as they have gotten into their older elementary aged years. But almost always their breakfast includes a bowl of cereal.

And all of these options can be made all.by.themselves.

We've got our three staple cereals to ensure the majority can be consumed by our dairy free and gluten free kids too: Rice Crispies, Honey Nut Cheerios and Frosted Flakes. Nothing super fun so I at least eliminate most of the junk found in boxed cereal. 

We keep it simple. 

Their bellies get full.

And I don't have to worry about meal planning, prepping and cleaning another meal up before the day even gets started.

So here is my permission to you. 

If you continually feel stressed over the breakfast-time rush and all that it entails, go buy a box of cereal, kiss your kids on the forehead and know that you are still a fantastic mama!

Day 15: NC - The Road To Home

Today was the day we would arrive back home.

We had stayed the night in a sweet little log cabin in Tennessee. It had a downstairs with a small kitchen, living room and bathroom and a loft upstairs with 3 beds. Jude made a pad on the floor (he had the entire King size bed at the Ranch, he's ok.) and the rest of us took the beds. It was such a cute cabin and the hospitality spoke throughout the whole property.

We only had one stop on the itinerary for the day. The stop was one we had been looking forward to the entire trip and had gotten us through to this last day. Something really fun to look forward to, ya know? 

But there were two specific things promised to the kids that hadn't happened yet. 

We promised if we saw a Buc-ees we would stop. And if you read some of the kids in this photo closely you can see that a couple of them were literally R-U-N-N-I-N-G into the building as soon as we put the car in park. I mean...it's the place to be. Everybody talks about it! 

A few observations from this bewildered mom:

1-Those are the nicest bathrooms this world has ever seen.

2-Those workers LOVE their job. Everyone was so cheery. Even for first-thing in the morning. It's a bit concerning.

3-Ya'll, it's a gas station. And I must admit to my skeptical attitude, believing they must really hike up the gas prices since this is such a big attraction. But ya'll, after close inspection (aka, meandering over to the pumps pretending like I belonged there) the gas prices were actually really good.

4-They have chefs ya'll. Actual chefs that sing songs while they chop up their BBQ and candy their walnuts.

5-I would absolutely go back.

"Is it worth the hype" you ask? I mean, it IS the amusement park of gas stations so I'll let you come to your own conclusion. But I will tell you, this stop was one of Alethia's highlights of the whole trip, lol!

It was lunchtime and we were in need of a quick "pit stop" if you know what I mean. Josh found a place to pull over, have a picnic (these would be our last sandwiches from the cooler for a while!), skip rocks and play in the water for a few minutes. The water was runoff from the Smoky Mountains and it was beautiful.

We were SO close to home! 

NC here we come!

We finally made it back to North Carolina. This is where our last stop would be. And this is where we finally started seeing signs for Dairy Queen, the other promised stop of this big trip. When I was growing up and we were taking our yearly summer roadtrip to Colorado we could always bank on Dad saying the car was malfunctioning (or taking on a mind of its own) and predictably ending up at a Dairy Queen, as I remember it anyway. So naturally, this was going to have to be a stop our family made. A Butterfinger Blizzard is my childhood wrapped up in one, big, delicious memory. We found a DQ really close to Henry River Mill Village, a ghost town in Hickory, NC where District 12 from the Hunger games was filmed. This was our last stop and we were pumped! As we were nearing the exit for the site we were in the middle of a torrential downpour. 

I have to stop and say right now, given the amount of time we were outside and on the road, we had the BEST weather. Even on stormy days, the Lord seemed to part the clouds, even if only for the few minutes we were walking around seeing something. Minus our near-death electrocution by lightning on Day 2 of course.

But since this last thing was outside we decided to take our DQ stop first.

We piled back into the car for our last stop. We arrived to a large metal closed gate with cameras all around, warning us of our impending doom if we were to disobey the rules (which meant we couldn't even sneak inside, boo). Apparently this place is an ACTUAL place with tickets and times and stuff. We got out and took a couple pictures of what we could and, with our tails between our wet legs, we climbed back into the car for the last few hours on the road before we got home.

We recovered from our disappointment quickly and I have put money aside to eventually make it back to this spot, but we couldn't hide that the day seemed a bit anticlimactic. 

No major hikes or sites.

No near-death experiences. 

(I know, I keep being dramatic.)

No more Airbnbs imagining what it would be like to "live here".

No more mountains and adventures.

Reality and responsibility were just a couple of hours away and we were all feeling it.

But that's how it is, right? You take adventures to experience new things. Things you don't get to experience every day. And how could you? There is so much beauty, so many avenues in life that you couldn't possibly posses it all.

When you live in the mountains you slowly begin to forget about them. 

When you take care of cows on a farm they don't make you giddy nearly as much as when you first get to ride out to them and feed the babies.

When you have a Buc-ees in your hometown I bet you won't rush out of the car to go RUN inside.

When the St. Louis Arch is in your backyard I doubt you are just dreaming for a chance to make your way through a 4th of July crowd just to put your own hands on it.

These were special moments. 

Memories I hope our kids will always remember. 

Experiences we will most likely never call our every day. 

But reality and responsibility aren't the other side of the coin. 

They are our GET TO.

We GET TO live here, in this home, doing these things God has called us to.

We are in a quest for meaning and purpose and fulfillment the rest of our lives.

And that GETS TO start right here in our humble home, in our every day.

It's so good to be home.

(Last photo by Zeke Via)

Day 14: TN - Memphis - Nashville

 We made it to TENNESSEE!

We didn't have any specific destinations for this day except to walk Beale Street in Memphis and go downtown in Nashville. And we didn't want to feel rushed. The girls especially were excited for this day!

We arrived in Memphis around lunchtime so the streets were still really quiet. Josh decided the kids needed a taste of the world famous Central BBQ. During our year of traveling to help out a church in Memphis, we frequented different BBQ joints and this was one of Josh's favorites. He got some great photos he posted on his Instagram of this day. After eating, we headed to Beale Street to walk the strip.

After Memphis I took over driving and steered us in the direction of Nashville. Let it be known that I navigated the streets of downtown Nashville in our 15 passenger van. I don't even attempt this feat in my own downtown. My girlfriends were very proud, thank you very much.

The crowds were beginning to pick up as we weaved our way in and out of strangers. There were so many sounds! Cars, horns, people, and a different band in every single restaurant or bar. I wonder how you get a decent sound check with all the doors and windows are open and you are competing with every other local band on tap for the night. It was wild!

The Ryman Auditorium

It was getting late and we still had an hour and a half drive to our next Airbnb.

That's when we noticed we had a headlight out...and we needed to make one final stop at the Kroger (because gas points!) for the last day's lunches so we made a couple of stops before arriving at our legit log cabin for the night.

Day 14: The Farm

 This Airbnb on a 300+ acre farm in Arkansas deserved its own post. Mostly because I have too many cow pictures to post. Now, I am aware that not all people love farms and cows and beautiful scenes overlooking the Ozarks, but it's my blog and if you don't like cows you can skip on to the next post.

Since we arrived so late the night before, and this place was epic, we decided to give the kids  slow morning to enjoy the atmosphere...and cows.

We got to the house late but the owners said they would wait on us to feed the baby cows. Um, excuse me...baby cows?! You should have seen the look on my face Rainy's face when we told her that! The owners showed up to greet us with an ATV and a 4-wheeler. We hadn't even unpacked the van before piling into these two vehicles and heading to the cow pasture on the property to find the hungry babies and give them dinner. These were two little orphan calves. There are several other babies on the properties that were being taken care of by their mamas.

After feeding the babies we hopped back on our rides and they took us to the crest of their property that overlooks the Ozarks to watch the sun set. Oh my gosh. It was beautiful! Then on to "the cave" which we had to make sure was clear of bats before entering. And then back up to another overlook before heading back to the van to unpack and get comfortable for the night.

This one by far one of Rainy's highlights of the entire trip.

Day 13: OK - AR

This day started out just fine.

And then we almost died.

Ok, so here is when the truth comes out about the flesh eating bugs I wrote about in the Colorado trip intro. They were actually a type of fly. And they bit. And it hurt really bad. (Or so I'm told) But there weren't just one or two of them. They were everywhere and left the majority of us randomly yelping out and hitting ourselves while jumping and skipping in zigzags the entire hike through Palo Duro Canyon. It really is a stunning place that I remember going as a kid, but as soon as we picked our little 2-mile trail to hike we very quickly realized that it was going to be miserable and that we needed bug spray ASAP. We all ran, flailing our arms, back to the van, generously doused ourselves with bug spray and chose just the 2nd half portion to hike because there was a cave. And cave's are cool. 

I actually laugh a little inside because I am the only one that didn't get any bites. NOT ONE. Here is the link to the lotion I lathered on after my shower that morning. I believe this is going to be our new bug deterrent. You're welcome. (And don't make fun of my boys when they walk past you in a hallway and you get a whiff of peony. This stuff literally saved my life.)

Here are a couple of my pictures from the less than enjoyable hike through the stunning rocks and caves of Palo Duro Canyon. Poor Jude has holes all in his crocs and those were his shoes of choice for the hike (life lessons) so he literally hiked the canyon, with actual rocks and cactus, barefoot! 

After that unforgettable hike we gladly sealed ourselves safely into our car and headed to our first stop on the day's schedule. On the way I noticed this water tower that looked like it was about to fall over and Josh said he actually saw that on one of his maps and it has a name. Leaning Tower of Britten. Huh...I would like to know who decides which things make it on a map?

And then we arrived at Shamrock, TX.

This little town, with it's Conoco station and U-Drop Inn diner, inspired the little town of Radiator Springs on the movie CARS. It was SO cute! And the older ladies working in the shop were so proud!

You may start to see a theme. Route 66 stuff is EVERYWHERE! It is now Interstate 40 that reaches all across the US, but there are still portions of the old Hwy that run parallel to the Interstate. But just a word of warning, if you veer off to drive on it, getting back to the interstate going the direction you need to go will cost you some valuable time (and possibly add a few gray hairs in the process).

This is me on the old Route 66

Once we eventually got back on track on I-40 we arrived in Oklahoma!

There are multiple Rt. 66 museums but we decided to opt for this one since it was on our way.

We ended our day in the state of Arkansas, eating dinner at Whataburger because the kids HAD to experience this too of course and sleeping at the coolest farm! That is coming next.