Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Now That's A Good Daddy

Areyna loves girly things.

She loves fixing hair (never her own though:), putting on makeup, wearing dresses and sparkly accessories and...

...painting nails.

It doesn't matter who it is, as long as she can use your nails as her canvas!

Yesterday she asked if Josh would like her to paint his nails.  His usual response is, "Nope, I'm good:)" and she is fine with that.

But yesterday his response was a little different.

He said, "Sure, do you have any boy colors?"

They proceeded to go through the color selections and pick the perfect boy blend of color for daddy. 

It was precious to watch her carefully apply the polish to his fingers as he sat patiently for her to be done.

I must admit that the shiny platinum catches me off guard when it flashes across the room, but I absolutely LOVE it!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Not Me Monday (On Tuesday)

I do not become a pillow snob when pregnant.

Nope, not me!

Really?  That is just so vain.  Becoming partial to a pillow, ha!

That just would never happen to this down-to-earth momma.


But, if for some reason I were to become that ridiculous...

I would NEVER make the one pillow that I absolutely have to daughters!

Oh no, not me.

That's like stealing candy from a baby Micaiah...except it's stealing a pillow from Areyna.

And what kind of mother goes around stealing pillows from their daughter?

Not this mama.

Because if I did, I'd have to start hiding it after every use, in fear that my daughter would see that, in fact, her mother had stolen her Cinderella adorned pillow, and decide to steal it right back.
And that would not make for a very happy mama.

So, nope, no pillow-stealin'-mama around here!


Monday, August 29, 2011

The View From Here

Family Devotions With Friends

What To Expect When You Are Expecting...#5 - Weeks 13-16

You may begin to feel those sweet little baby flutters this month, but remember, holding your breathe for more will only cause a black out, not more of those sweet little movements in your tummy:)

You may as well get used to cooking but not being able to eat it.  For some reason dinner only looks appetizing if someone else fixes it, ha!

You know "the smell test" you use to see if laundry is clean or dirty?  Yeah, don't even try it!

Unlike your first pregnancy when you could hardly wait to be showing and wearing those cute maternity clothes, you may find yourself squeezing into your normal clothes for as long as you possibly can.  Just be aware that you may look like the "fat guy in a little coat" if you wait too long to make the transition:)

Gas-X and Tums will most certainly become your best friend.

Eating the leftover bites off of your kid's plates is no longer considered a meal!  Calories are needed at this point.

Your tolerance for other people's kids will deplete day by day.  Just tell your friends and family not to hold it against you:)

It will help if you can keep natural disasters coming (i.e. Earthquakes and Hurricanes).  It will give you something else to blame your children's insanely hyperactive tendencies on, instead of your lazy weary parenting approach caused from your lack of energy and motivation.

If brushing your teeth continues to be an issue, begin buying packs of gum in bulk.  It's cheaper!


This month has been an emotional roller coaster, but I have continued to stay vomit-free!  Bouts of nausea are still eminent on a daily basis, but still, I can't complain.

Headaches are the big issue for me this time around.

I have had 2 really bad colds this month!  It is taking me so long to get over these little illnesses.  They are more of a nuisance than anything.  I know my immune system is shot.

I am patiently waiting for that surge of energy to come during this second trimester, but I'm beginning to feel less hopeful that it will happen this time around.

And for your viewing pleasure...a shiny 16-week photo because I still haven't figured out how to take a good picture with my camera:)
16-Week Belly

Saturday, August 27, 2011

The Weather Nerd Dictionary For Dummies

This gust was pushing me over.
Here's a post for all you weather nerd wannabe's.  Just a few tidbits about Hurricane season and the definitions surrounding the storm.

Hurricane Categories -

■ Category 1 hurricanes have sustained winds of 74 to 95 mph. These very dangerous winds will produce some damage.
■ Category 2 hurricanes have sustained winds of 96 to 110 mph. These extremely dangerous winds will cause extensive damage.
■ Category 3 hurricanes have sustained winds of 111 to 130 mph. Devastating damage will occur.
■ Category 4 hurricanes have sustained winds of 131 to 155 mph. Catastrophic damage will occur.
■ Category 5 hurricanes have sustained winds greater than 155 mph. Catastrophic damage will occur.
 Source: NOAA

Storm Surge - a rise in level of coastal water - a rise in sea level above the usual tide as a hurricane or other intense storm moves over water, causing flooding when the storm comes ashore.

Deteriorating Conditions - for some reason everyone just likes to use this phrase...over and over...when talking about the hurricane conditions:)

Overwash - a deposit of marine-derived sediments landward of a barrier system, often formed during large storms; transport of sediment landward of the active beach by coastal flooding during a tsunami, hurricane, or other event with extreme wave action

Why is everyone freaking out about a Category 1 Hurricane?  Because of it's size and duration.

Eye Wall - The eye wall of a hurricane surrounds the eye of the hurricane with a wall of clouds that is considered the most deadly area of a hurricane. The eye wall removes any trace of a storm from the hurricane's eye and produces deadly winds more than 150 mph.

Eye - the center of the storm as well as the calmest part of the storm. When you see a photo of a hurricane, the eye is the empty hole in the middle of the storm that the bands of the hurricane surround. The eye is calm and almost serene, and is where the weather service flies its planes into to determine the ferocity of the storm.
Spiral Bands - Hurricanes have spiral bands that surround the eye wall of the storm. These bands are what produce the vast majority of the wind and rain that hurricanes produce and are the largest part of the storm.
Hurricane Season - Begins June 1 and ends November 30.

Friday, August 26, 2011

The View From Here

Fun Facts For Friday

Yesterday felt so much like a Friday to me that I woke up feeling like today is a Saturday.  It's a weird feeling...

I have had a terrible cold this week...again.  The kind that makes your head hurt from coughing so hard.  The kind that makes your nose drip when you tilt your head forward to talk to the kids.  The kind where you eat a wonderfully tasty meal but can't actually taste a thing because your nose is so stuffy.  The kind where just walking outside to hang the laundry up on the line feels like you just ran a marathon.

I'm 16 weeks pregnant!  Where is the time going?!  Two weeks from today we can find out if it is a boy or a that is crazy!

Hurricane Irene is said to make an appearance tomorrow.  I can't help but get's the weather nerd in me:)  I remember growing up in Texas and frantically preparing the yard for the coming Tornado or other awesome storm that came our way!  I loved the excitement of the dark clouds moving in and the gentle breeze blowing before the storm approached while I excitedly ran around picking up the small toys in the yard that would inevitably end up in the neighbors yard.

All this word typing has made my arms and fingers feel like spaghetti so it's time for me to rest:)

But first, a picture to start your day with.
My adventurous boys:)
Happy Friday ya'll!

Thursday, August 25, 2011

The (Temporary) Death Of A Super Hero

Zeke woke up this morning with a massive swollen bug bite on his arm.  He was itching it and saying that it hurt.  So, naturally, I gave him the proper dosage of Benadryl.

About 20 minutes later we noticed a huge change in Zeke.

He was no longer climbing on the walls and door frames.

He was no longer begging to wrestle.

He was no longer jumping off of furniture.

He wasn't even interested in getting into any kind of Super Hero costume.

Instead, he was quietly sitting around.

He was contently playing his Leapster.

He cuddled up with Josh for a while.

He concentrated through his school work.

Instead of asking for wrestling he asked for us to read him a book.

He even asked if I would let him take a nap this afternoon.

No fits.

No outbursts.

I kinda like my medicated little boy:)

It's kind of like when you see your kids and how sweet they can be when they are sleeping...

I must admit, though, I kinda miss my hyperactive little boy that I'm used to. 

You know, the one who is full of life and energy.

The one who can turn anything into a guitar to play.

The one who rescues his Princess sister from the bad guys and sits on his protesting little brother.

I'm sure he'll be back in full swing in a few short hours!

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

The View From Here

Sweet Baby Hannah (my niece) taking a nap this afternoon

Straw Bale Gardening 101

Now, don't be jealous when you see the beautiful pictures of my garden!

Just kidding.  You're allowed your one moment of jealousy.

Especially when you see the luscious, green grass growing all around the perimeter:)
 And when you see just how fertile these straw bales have really become!
 For some reason when people come over we have to keep repeating that it is a garden
and NOT a pet cemetery...
In all seriousness though, I am just laughing it off.  I mean really, what's a woman supposed to do when she leaves for weeks at a time during the hottest part of the summer.  Her garden goes unattended and dries up.

I've been reading in the New Testament over the past few weeks.  All these vineyard and field owners just hired workers and slaves to do the work for them.  I am beginning to realize that this just might be the way to go.  I can just pay them in beans and pumpkins, ha!

There's always next year:)

Wait, this year's not over yet!  I think I'll try to use these super fertile bales for some good.  I think we're gonna clear out the beautiful, green grass around the inside and plant some fall crops.  Anyone want to come get a Pumpkin from our patch this fall?

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Conversation Piece

If you know our family at all you know that attire is not a battle worth fighting on most occasions around here.  I guess I am just so used to my kids wearing costumes that when we need to run a quick errand I don't even think twice about the fact that instead of loading up Zeke and Areyna into the car, I have, in fact, loaded up Ariel and Iron Man.

Most of the time it just slips my mind until we enter the public scene and we begin getting the usual reactions that range from "Awww, they are so cute:)" to looks of "what in the world was that mom thinking letting her children out in public in that!".

It has kind of become their trade mark around town and church.

We'll walk into band rehearsal on Thursday nights and the sound and tech team are just guessing which superhero Zeke will be on that particular night.

But, just last week I realized that there may be a little more to this sure-wear-your-brother's-too-small-Batman-costume-that-reveals-way-too-much attitude.

I walked into our small town post office and prepped myself to have a happy heart, no matter what attitude our postal worker may have.  She tends to be a bit abrasive, harsh and just plain bitter.  She very rarely smiles...unless she sees Zeke.  OR unless she is talking about his cute little costumes.

This particular day she was her normal grumpy self as I smiled my way through my transaction.  Then, she began asking questions about our little "blonde-haired boy with the little boots and red cape".  Her face lit up as she began to chuckle just thinking about him:)

Maybe my sweet, quirky little boy, will help bring light to a very bitter soul.  Maybe he will help open up conversation that would never have the opportunity of even arising.

So, I will proudly continue to let Superman run errands with me and just wait for an opportunity for him to shine!

Monday, August 22, 2011

Not Me Monday

I am so glad that I am as patient as I am.

Yup.  I'm patient.

In fact, when I am waiting on something to happen, I just wait.  I don't manipulate or will for something to happen.

Nope, not me!

I am always living in the moment.  Never thinking about the future possibilities of the desired thing I am waiting patiently for.

Nope, not me.

So for me, the fact that the Ugandan courts reconvened last Monday meant absolutely nothing.

I did not wait expectantly with my phone by my side, checking my email at least 10 times an hour a day in anticipation of hearing something about our case.

No way, not me!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Fun Facts For Friday

It's been a little different around our house this week.

My brother and his wife drove in from the DC area to come and visit.  It was nice to have them here and catch up on their lives up north.  We really don't get to see my family all that much because of distance and craziness of life, so it was pretty sweet to be able to connect outside of the holiday hustle and bustle.

Another update is that my parents will be moving back here to the East Coast from Colorado!  I have mixed feelings about all that.  Only because selfishly it was nice to know that we had a get-away in the mountains to go to.  But really, with 5 (soon to be 7) plain tickets to purchase it was tough to really "get away", so we are welcoming their move to Marion, NC in just a couple of weeks!  Bring on the 1.7 Acres of fun to run around on:)

I felt the first baby flutters this week.  Every morning our little one wakes up with me and gives a little kick to let me know he/she's up and at 'em for the morning.  I-Love-It!  They are getting more frequent throughout the day now.  Can you believe we can find out if it's a boy or a girl in just 3 short weeks!

With little to no warning Cai has entered into the "Terrible Two's".  I mean, running full force and busting down the door into this stage!  The whole arching the back, throwing down on the floor and screaming has hit a new level within just the past few days...and so it goes...another stage of life begins for our sweet, sweet little Cai-bo.  Dear Lord give me patience!

I am so ready for fall that I can hardly stand it.  I am having to restrain myself from opening up all the windows at 7am when it is nice and cool, knowing that it will soon be muggy and hot by the time the kids get out of bed.  But soon enough it will be here.

Ahhhh, the football playing in the background, the kids running around in the yard, the pumpkin spice candles burning throughout the house and something yummy baking in the oven...

Josh just called and he landed safely in Memphis.  He is there playing at Fellowship Memphis again this weekend.  I know he feels totally out of his element, but I absolutely love hearing him practice his black gospel sets for this church!  Brings back so many good BSU memories from college:)

Have I mentioned how much I love my man lately?!

Wow, can you tell my husband is gone.  I could go on and on today.  I must have a lot of extra words to get out, ha!

I better stop while I'm ahead though:)

Have a GREAT Friday, ya'll!

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Eliminating Anxiety

After going off of my anxiety medication for this pregnancy I quickly realized that I was going to have to work extra hard at finding the triggers for my anxiety if I was going to be able to cope well as a pregnant mommy and wife.

Some of my triggers are just things that are necessary for our family to do to get by.  One of those is couponing.  Just thinking about the whole process that needs to be done to get a grocery list together was becoming overwhelming to me, though!

But, I needed to prioritize what was best for our family in this season in our lives.  I had to decide to put my family and our sanity before saving a few bucks at the grocery store.

Couponing isn't bad.  But getting anxious and overwhelmed just thinking about it IS!  The pressure.  Josh totally took the pressure off by confirming that if it made me anxious to get rid of it.  Just hearing him say it took a load off my chest (as if he wouldn't support me otherwise...oh yea of little faith:). 

I have continued to keep up with expired coupons and cutting and organizing them but with no strings attached.  If I have time (and motivation) I'll get online and get my deals and grocery list ready, but there is NO pressure.  Otherwise, I'll just make a grocery list the way I used to and go to the store with the cheapest prices.  I just have to choose to buy less and make healthier choices with the money we do have.

It was hard to not feel guilty at first, but I am all about eliminating anxiety triggers to keep this baby healthy, not to mention my relationships with my other family members:)

I know that this is just a season and I'll be back on the couponing wagon again, but for now, I choose sanity and tranquility, ha!

What triggers your anxiety that you just have to choose to cut out of your life sometimes?

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

The View From Here

Lessons From The Classroom - Progress Report

Well, we've made it past our first month of school.  It has been a learning curve for all of us, but I feel like we've got a great routine now and am excited for what's to come!

Now, I am about to become very vulnerable here, so no snickering:)  It's time to reveal the name I've chosen for our school.


"Learning Together"

I know, I know.  Super cheesy, but they have all these little requirements for choosing your school name, and I have no clue what I'm doing so I figured it was the perfect name for a first-time Home School mom and her first-time Home Schooled kids.

Last week Zeke finished up Get Ready for the Code - Book a with 5 stars!  I am so proud of him and all the little light bulbs (no matter how dim they are) that have gone off in his little brain as he begins piecing together the things he's learned with everyday life:)
The next two weeks or so we are going to review the letters one-by-one that he learned in this book before moving on.  I've got some fun activities planned and reading as he finds the letter of the day.  It should be fun!

Areyna has been flying through her lessons.  I went ahead and started her in Explode the Code 1 to make sure we didn't leave anything out with her other reading book.  It is really easy for her right now, but there are a few things that this curriculum has added that have been really good for her.

For example:  This activity below was new for her.  She had to think of 2 words for each of the endings I wrote on her paper and sound the words out to write them down herself.  I've been very impressed with her progress.  I'm wondering if I should be a little worried with the last word choice for -eg, ha!

I didn't anticipate her moving so quickly so now we're waiting on Explode the Code Book 2 to get here.  We should be finished with that one by Christmas.

Math is, by far, Areyna's favorite thing to work on.  She will be finished with her first book of Horizons Math K SET of 2 Student Workbooks K-1 and K-2.  Again, I went ahead and began with Kindergarten to get her used to the curriculum and to make sure we aren't leaving anything out.  She should be all caught up and completed with first grade on time at the rate she is going!

She can now tell time on the hour.  She can write and count to 100 by 5's and 10's.  Her addition is getting quicker, she is counting money and she is getting much better at following the directions.

So, I give my class an A+ for the first 6 weeks (almost) of school.

I wasn't so impressed with their teacher for the first few weeks, but I think she is getting used to her class and her responsibilities.  She is more comfortable saying "no" to things because school must be done, and she is actually beginning to enjoy teaching her children:)

Monday, August 15, 2011

Not Me Monday

Photo Compliments of Areyna Via
I did not drive straight past my house the other night.  Nope, we've lived here for almost 2 years now.  I know my driveway!

I did not get into a super cleaning mood the other day and actually scrub down all the sticky baseboards and cabinets in my whole kitchen.  Nope not me.

I did not get sucked into watching "Staying Alive" instead of taking a nap the other day.  Nope, nothing gets in the way of my sleep.  Especially, some old flick on the CW Sunday Afternoon Cinema Channel:)

I do not have a mountain of laundry piled on the couch where the kids have been digging out clothes and jammies to wear for the past three days.  Nope, not me.

I do not continually leave my husband stranded around 9pm every night because I can't seem to keep my eyes open any later.  Nope, not me.

I cannot drink coffee when I'm pregnant.  Not because of the caffeine and I think it hurts the baby, but because my taste buds change and I simply cannot stomach it.  So, I would NEVER hold my nose and endure a cup just to "get things moving" if ya know what I mean.  Oh no, not me!

I would never admit why I've been a religious coffee drinker over the past week, when I can hardly stomach the stuff, to the whole blogosphere.  Nope, not me!

Darn it.  There goes my tongue again, spouting off whatever comes to mind.  Sheesh!

Happy Not Me Monday:)

Friday, August 12, 2011

Fun Facts For Friday

I think we've found a great routine here at the Via Home Of Schooling:) (No, that's not the name of our school, it just sounded fun at the moment, ha!)  We've found our groove and we're sticking to it.  I'll give a full recap of the past month of school next week.  It's been going great, and I must say, the kid's teacher has had a much better attitude toward teaching our kids over the past few weeks.

My bestest bud and her hubby had their baby yesterday morning!  New life never gets old to me.  I still get giddy every time I get a text from someone saying they are on their way to the hospital to have their baby.  Hey, that'll be us in less than 6 months!

Yes, 6 more months.  I am growing out of my regular clothes on a daily basis now:(  Oh well...I can take it...6 more months...

We received our first check from Just Love Coffee.  This organization is helping us raise money for our adoption one bag of coffee at a time.  For every bag you buy, we get $5 toward our personal adoption!  So, go get you some coffee worth two great causes...a happy heart for you in the morning, and support to get our little girl home!

The Ugandan courts reconvene on MONDAY!  We hope to hear something soon after they re-open so we'll have a more definite time line of when we'll be traveling.

After last weekends Yard Sale we are down to about $4000 to raise!  That's it...I can't believe it.  You can help that number go down by buying our coffee and/or by cashing in your Change For Change that you've been saving up.  Go ahead and send those on in!  We're getting close ya'll!

We have new service times this weekend at Journey.  Take your pick and come on out to join us!
8:40am, 10:15am, 11:55am.  Oh, and go sign up for a LUGGAGE GIVE AWAY that is going along with our new series!

On a different note, the weather has been absolutely beautiful in the mornings.  The kids and I even spent a few hours outside before lunch yesterday!  Bring on the FALL!

Here's a sweet picture to leave you with this morning!
I went back and noticed that most of my pictures recently have been of Cai.  *sigh* He's just growing up so fast, and his recent birthday has just been a reminder of how big he is getting:)

Have a great Friday ya'll!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

The View From Here


Your Storeroom Is Full

We each have a storeroom. 

Each of them are full. 

But what are they full of?

Is your storeroom full of encouragement for others?  Or maybe bitterness, jealousy, envy, joy, faith, love...

Whatever fills your storeroom is what overflows from your mouth!

"For the mouth speaks from the overflow of the heart.  
A good man produces good things from his storeroom of good, 
and an evil man produces evil things from his storeroom of evil.  
I tell you that on the day of judgment 
people will have to account for every careless word they speak."
Matthew 12: 34-36

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

A Birthday, A Total and A Fun Little Road Trip

Our sweet little Cai turned 2 years old on Saturday.  He's no longer my baby boy. 

He is now our sweet little boy who walks in a single file line between classes at church, and sits at the table to work intently on whatever project has captured his attention, who is beginning to formulate short sentences to let us know how he's feeling, and who decided to peepee in the potty for the first time on Sunday morning, what?!?!

We celebrated his birthday in the midst of the second day of the Via and Via Yard Sale.
Speaking of yard sales:)

Friday went without a hitch, with the usual ongoing flow of shoppers.
Saturday, on the other hand, was a bit of a washout...literally!  We woke up to thunder and rain pouring down.  It lasted until about 11, and then by the time we finally got everything dried off and set up, it began pouring again!  We didn't actually get to begin the sale until around lunchtime.  The crowd was really slow the whole day, until we started advertising everything for $1-$5!  We did that until it was almost too dark to see what we were doing.  By that time we were advertising, "Fill Up Your Truck/Van for $10, ha!  (And even then, somebody had the nerve to ask if we could "do any better than that".  Really, a van full for $10 is too steep?)

It was a fun filled weekend and WELL WORTH IT!

The grand total for the weekend was: $2587!!!!

That means that each family is now $1200 closer to our goal to bring home our little girls!

Two stupidist comments of the weekend that I just HAVE to document:
"So, when you get those girls are you gonna keep 'em?"
"Awww, it's just like when you see a sweet puppy on the side of the road and you wanna take 'em home."

This clearly shows how the majority of the US feels about adoption...very sad!

Moving on...

The excitement doesn't end there!

Josh won us some tickets to go see Hillsong United tonight in Greenville, SC!  I'm so excited!  I've never seen Hillsong live.  PLUS, we are taking our buddy Andy Cherry, and his sweet wife Michelle.  It's going to be awesome.

So, I better get packing.  Have a GREAT Tuesday, ya'll!

Monday, August 8, 2011

Not Me Monday

Zeke is really big on details.


He's also really good at keeping funny stories to himself.


So, after hearing a certain story about his Aunt Kelly going down a slide and going swimming, naked, with only her undies, he would certainly keep it to himself.

Oh yes!

He'd never run around telling everyone in earshot.

But if he did he'd certainly forget about it after a day or two.

Because after a day or two it would be a church day and he'd want to blurt it out to his classmates and teachers telling them that his aunt Kelly likes to go swimming in only her undies.

And if he did that he might forget to mention that it was when she was a toddler and NOT in her current days!

And my son would NEVER embarrass her like that.

Oh no, Not Him!

Thursday, August 4, 2011

The View From Here / The Final Hoorah

We are having our FINAL yard sale this weekend!
I'm so grateful to have such nice items to sell, so thank you to all who have
(and still are) donating.
WHEN: Friday and Saturday
WHAT TIME: Early to as long as we can take the heat, ha!
WHERE: Our humble abode in Rolesville
(let me know if you need our address)

I can honestly say that if I never have another yard sale during the rest of my lifetime I will be okay with that:)  We are trying to do all we can to raise the remainder of our money for this adoption, so come join us this weekend, because once again, we will be hosting the Yard Sale event of the year here in Rolesville.  And once again, it will be of EPIC proportions (ie-my yard will look like the city flea market:)

Items are listed but NOT limited to:
Children's clothes
Children's shoes
Baby clothes
Strollers and
TONS of baby gear
Baby bedding
Other size bedding
Stuffed Animals
LOTS of kitchen appliances
TONS of Toys
Exercise Equipment
TV's, VHS players, Computer programs, Printers, Scanners
Electrical Dog Fence

And the list goes on and on.

Come join us!
I'm sure there is SOMETHING here you need!

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Mommy Emotions

I'm not one to get very sentimental when it comes to my kids growing up.  I'm just not.

I know, I cry about everything else, from sappy commercials to cartoon animated movies (i.e.-UP), but "older" stages just aren't one of those areas...for now anyway.

That being said...

I opened my email this afternoon to an email about Micaiah moving up to his new class at church.  It went into detail about the fun activities he will be doing and all the snacks he gets to eat and the sweet teachers he'll have.

Then the email continued.  It shared about the Bible Story and worship time that he'd be participating in on a weekly basis...and then the tears began to flow.

I honestly can't wait to peak in on his little class and see him interacting with others as he learns about his great maker!

I love that we go to a church that understands that children, even as young as 2 years old, are old enough to begin learning about the stories and characters of Jesus from the Bible.

Now that's enough to make a momma tear up a little bit:)

Monday, August 1, 2011

Not A Feeling

Sometimes my spiritual walk feels so full that I simply cannot keep it in.  I have to share what the Lord is teaching me.  I feel so close to Him.

Then, there are times in my spiritual walk where I can hardly keep my mind focused enough to read through a single chapter in the Bible.  I have to read and reread through it and force my mind to comprehend what I'm reading.  My mind wanders, my thoughts trail off, and it's difficult for me to feel like I can find Him.

It is such a comfort to know that our Lord doesn't leave.  He doesn't drift away.  I may drift from Him, but He is always here.  He is constant.  He is always consistent. 

Just because I don't "feel" Him doesn't mean He is not near.  Even when I can't formulate the words to pray to Him.  I can simply be in His presence, mind wandering and thoughts trailing off and all.  He knows.  He hears.  He loves.

He's here.