Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Letters To Alethia ~ To The Girl Who Stole My Heart

Alethia Grace,

My little brown skinned, Ugandan princess.

I always said I could adopt.  I never thought I actually WOULD adopt.

Over three years ago you stole my heart.

I began imagining life with you in it.

Now I can't imagine life WITHOUT you!

The day we picked you up from the babies home I held you in my arms the entire drive back to Jinja as you slept.  I couldn't stop staring at you.  You were so small.  So beautiful.  So scared.

I was so scared.  To be quite honest I was afraid of the forever that had just rocked our family's world.  I wasn't sure I was up for the hard work that was required. 

How was I supposed to love you the same?

Two years in and I am finally learning that I'm not supposed to love you the same.  I am supposed to love you AS MUCH, but I am supposed to love you differently.

You process differently, you hold on differently, you attach differently, your feelings get hurt differently, you view the world differently.

Loving you and mommying you has been one of the most eye opening things I've ever experienced.  Being your mommy has opened my eyes to just how selfish I am.

I may have missed those hours of staring into your eyes while providing food for you as an infant and watching you sleep peacefully after a day trying to master a new milestone but I have you NOW.

I am not always the most patient and understanding mommy that you need, but I am learning.

I pray that God will continue to mold me to be exactly what you need.
I pray that God will soften your heart toward Him.
I pray that you will always know we love you and that you can take pride in the Via you are!

You are ours,
You are God's,
and I love you with all my heart.

Happy Birthday,
Love Mommy

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