The Day The Butter ALMOST Won

Last week I went to Costco to get my monthly stock pile (Thank you, Heidi!  Our lives will never be the same:).

I was doing well working through my list, until I got to the butter.

I saw a great price on sticks of butter.
I placed the package in my cart, as one typically does with an item they want to purchase.
Then I walked away, as one typically does when they have made their final decision on a product.
Only to get two steps away from said, perfect purchase option before seeing the organic grass fed option.

I quickly grab the before-mentioned butter and place it back in its refrigerated place and replace it with the better butter, as one typically does when finding a better option.
Only to see the price difference, as one typically does when finding that better option.

I frown at the price but justify the purchase.
No farther than two steps past the butter section my conscious gets the better of me.

I race back to the butter and put the organic butter back and confidently get the regular butter and matter-of-factly return it back to its rightful place in my cart.

But wait, all the other "stuff" in this butter.
The other butter is BETTER.
More nutrients.
More real ingredients.
PURE.

I annoyingly take it back out of my cart and put it away.
Walk two steps to my right and get the organic back out.
No, I stare at it with the refrigerator door wide open.

By this time I have made quite the scene.

The manic woman dodging back and forth in the butter aisle may need some assistance!

I literally began to panic.
How in the world am I supposed to feed this Colony well, on the budget we have.
I KNOW what our bodies need.
I KNOW how some of these ingredients affects a couple of the high-strung Colony kids.
How in the world am I supposed to do this?!
Why does putting good, healthy food on the table have to be so difficult?

I am on the verge of tears (and I have already stripped myself of my scarf and jacket from the profuse panic-induced sweat that I am in) and called Josh.

"Baby, what am I supposed to do?  I have, HAD, regular butter in the cart, but then I saw the organic butter, but it's nearly $4 more for the same amount.  What the *&$% am I supposed to buy?!"

By this time I'm sure he is mentally going through the steps to get me admitted into the psyche ward upon my safe arrival back home, but instead he just told me that he trusted my judgement, believed that I had a good handle on what our family needs and that buying the regular butter would be just fine this month.

After hanging up with my super-sweet and sensitive husband (thanks for hanging in there with me when the butter got the best of me, baby), I stood between the two butters eyeing them and literally prayed for the peace of mind I needed to buy the right butter.

As ridiculous as that sounds, I don't believe God sat up in heaven and rolled his eyes at me.  He may have chuckled at the show I put on for the dozens of passersby that saw my little "melt" down (did you see what I did there, ha!), but he cares about our little stuff.

He also knows that I take my job as food supplier and financial budget keeper seriously.  He knows what our kids need and what our bodies can handle.  He knows this battle trying to eat healthy in America on a budget with a large family.

He knows it all.
And He smiles when we ask him to help us walk through it.

So, if you are confused or burdened, if you can't decide on which road to take or job to say yes to, or maybe you just need to be confident in the butter you choose for you family...

He is happy to walk that road with us.

Another Transformation (of the dresser to trunk variety)

This used to be the boys dresser.

Actually when it was given to us by our friends it was 

the yellow(ish) color on the bottom of the dresser feet.

(I'm not very good at keeping things their original color...)

But over time 

(and quite possibly a result of the frequency of rearrangements it had endured, ahem)

the drawers began to break.

In this pictures you can see that the bottom drawer had broken 

so we used that space to place baskets with board games

It served its purpose well until yet another drawer broke.

We ended up moving it back into the boys room and used the top two drawers for Jude's clothes.

The bottom half was turned into a reading nook with pillows and books.

But then the boys room was feeling a little cramped.

That's when I decided to move Jude to his big boy bed.

Which gave us more space under his bed for his own clothes.

The other boys clothes were moved into their closet.

So the only items I needed to find a home for were the boys costumes.

That is pretty much their only toy in their room.

I mentally created a plan and with a little help from the hubs

we transformed this beautiful dresser into a trunk for the boy's costumes.

My next project: trying to figure out how I can make my couch into a pull-out sofa!

Being Made Approachable Through My "Holy Spirit Filter"

Have you ever had to be corrected?

I haven't...well, there was that one time...
HA!

Just kidding.
I actually think that I am in need of daily correction (aren't we all?).

If it's not from my 9-year-old-know-it-all, it is from my 2-year-old know-it-all (those are always fun moments), and then sometimes it is even from my husband and my friend, and most certainly by the Holy Spirit who resides within.

If you have been around here for much time, you know that I carry a burden to be whole-heartedly and sometimes painfully and brutally honest.

But that honesty comes with a price tag.

I have to be approachable.
I have to be teachable.

It's a tough place to be.  Nobody likes or enjoys people to tell them that they are wrong or need to change or reevaluate something.  And it's never fun to be called out on something, especially in front of other people.  It often gives me a nauseous feeling in my stomach until it has been processed through my "Holy Spirit filter" and made right.

For example, I wrote a blog a week or so ago and I had a friend lovingly contact me to share her heart with me.  She felt like some of the wording could be offensive to someone.  She was quick to affirm my honest and pure intentions but encouraged me to be above reproach and change it.

My first feeling was that sick knot in my stomach.  Then I was beginning to feel the defensive walls coming up (hey, I'm still human!), but then my Holy Spirit filter quickly caught those racing thoughts and defensive attitudes and began placing perspective on the situation at hand.

Here are some things my "Holy Spirit Filter" can help me decipher:

1 - THE SOURCE - is this information coming from a friend, someone in my close circle, whom I have handed the accountability reigns of my life to?  If so, then I need to listen and be approachable.

2 - THE HEART - where is this person coming from?  Do they legitimately have a point?  If I take myself out of the equation and look at the facts, what is the heart behind it all?  And what is my reaction showing about my motivations and my self?

3 - HAVE I BEEN APPROACHABLE - I always want to be approachable.  As soon as I set up walls of inferiority or untouchability I am placing myself in a dangerous spot.  Eventually people will stop trying to penetrate those walls to get to me and I will be a target left alone in an open field waiting from the "one who seeks to destroy" to shoot his fiery arrows straight at my heart!

Whether someone has to approach me about something I've said or done, or maybe the way my children have been acting or the way I've spoken to or about my husband...whatever it is...I want people to feel safe coming to me.  I can't promise that my defensive walls won't start rising up around me for a bit, sometimes my flesh gets the best of me, but I can promise you that my "Holy Spirit filter" will quickly come to the rescue!

My desire is to allow the Holy Spirit to do the sifting in order to keep me teachable.

The COLONY "Buy-Back" Program

There's something about this time of year that turns my sweet, loving children into these scary creatures.

It's that darn candy!

I'm not exaggerating.

They turn into drooling, selfish, whiny, argumentative, greedy, tantrum-throwing little monsters who won't give in until every last candy wrapper has been licked clean.

(not to mention the effects it does to a certain one's emotional state!)

So, naturally I have to lay down some rules for the mayhem that ensues this very evening of every year.

Usually we let them eat along the way, but as soon as we get home we put it all in a "family bucket" and throw it away a week later, no matter how much is left.  But this still means that our family has the looming presence of the "family bucket" which means we must ask mommy (then daddy) every 10 minutes for another piece of candy until mommy gets so fed up that she ends up throwing it away.

But this year...
this year is going to different.

I was talking to my chiropractor about this "problem" and he told me that he took an idea from his neighboring dentist down the hallway and buys back his kid's candy.

BRILLIANT!

So last night I approached my kids with the idea and told them that they could eat candy to their hearts content ALL NIGHT LONG while we are out.  Then when we get home they get to pick out their 3 favorite pieces to eat over the weekend.

And for each of their buckets of candy I would give them $3 (Minus Jude.  I get a by for him for at least another year, ha!)

I think I can make it through the night now, knowing that for just $12 I will have my sweet children back by morning:)

Happy trick-or-treating ya'll!

Not Me Monday (on Thursday)

I would never believe all the hype about giving your ADHD child caffeine to help refocus him in the afternoon.

Nope, caffeine is bad.
Bad, bad, bad.

But if I were to be as desperate as to try this little "trick" I would probably stick to a more "natural" approach than the soda I've heard other mothers trying on there kids.

(That just seems counter-productive to me.  Believe me, I've SEEN our child on a soda kick.  NOT pretty...)

So, if I were to delve into this world of purposefully offering my attentive-lacking child some caffeine to get him through his school day I would naturally go the dark chocolate route.

Oh yes, because there are health benefits to dark chocolate.
It's basically as good as vegetables.
Yeah, I'd go with that.

But real dark chocolate isn't something that is normally on the grocery list, which is therefore, not typically in the budget, but the good Lord KNEW we needed dark chocolate and put it on sale the week I wanted to try this little "trick".

It's pretty much a sign from above.
My family needed to buy this dark chocolate.
It was just meant to be.

And I like the real dark chocolate with sea salt.
Oh.My.GAWSH.
My mouth just waters thinking about it.

But this was a selfless purchase.
For physical benefits.
For attention.
For my boy.
His education.
It was all for my child.
I repeated it several times a day.
It is NOT for me.
It is NOT for MY indulgence.

Nope.

So, the emotional day I was having yesterday would NEVER warrant my confiscation of said, selfless-purchased dark chocolate with sea salt.

Oh no.

I never steal candy from an emotion-filled 8-year-old boy.

No way.

Because then I would have to explain to the rest of the Colony why mommy got to have some of the aforementioned chocolate after the stern lectures about how it was only for the aforementioned child and his excelling education.

And I NEVER try to hide my sins.
Oh, such a deep, dark, sea salt covered sin.

But I did get two bars.
(they were BOGO)

And if I went ahead and ate the last square of the first bar and the first 2 of the second bar nobody would ever know.

But I would NEVER eat all that chocolate.
Just because I lacked the self-control to stop.

Oh no.
Not me.

This mama is the epitome of self-control.
I am in control 100% of the time.

Which means I NEVER would have emotional days that got so out of control, making me rationalize the consumption of that much chocolate.

Good grief.
What kind of woman would I even be?!

But by the time I mentally went through the list of why I couldn't possibly get away with this scheme I noticed that all the chocolate was gone.

Hmmm...where did it go?

I guess I'll just have to go get some more all natural, real, dark chocolate (that is basically the equivalent of at LEAST 4 cups of vegetables) for my son because someone stole it all.

But it wasn't me.

Nope.
Not me.

Isaiah 61:10

Fighting For My Marriage: Book Reviews Of Current Reads

I have been inundated with marriage books lately.  I'm not sure why they have been falling in my lap over the past couple of months but I'm not complaining.

I just finished up a book called, For Women Only, by Shaunti Feldhahn.  Wow, what an eye-opening, excellent book.  Most of the contents of the book I had known already, or at least had heard of, but the thing I loved about it is the fact that it gives scientific facts and data that back it all up, as well as multiple studies and interviews by men of all ages and walks of life.

I'm telling you, if this book doesn't rock your world and give you more compassion, love and respect for your husband, and the other men around you, I don't know what will!  I would encourage EVERY woman to read this book.  It's not only for the married woman, but for the singles out there as well.  It will give you some much needed insight into the lives and mentality of a man that will help you support and encourage them, as you walk beside them on their journey for purity.

The other book that I am now in the middle of is called, Kiss Me Like You Mean It, by Dr. David Clarke.  I'm only a few chapters in, but just the intro had me hooked, and laughing my butt off at the reality of the woman/man dynamics he portrays.

The thing is, I don't view my marriage as falling apart or struggling.  I think Josh and I do a fairly decent job at communicating our wants, needs and struggles (which I couldn't have said about 12 years ago, ha!).  He is, by far, my best friend.

But on the other hand, I know that no marriage is perfect (that's exactly what Satan wants you to believe, so he can swoop in at any given weak moment and destroy it all!) .  Josh and I are far from perfect people.  As a matter of fact, we are sinful, selfish people, but we have committed to do life together, even through the stresses of daily foolish choices, mistakes, financial crisis, communication breaches and demanding children.

As I wade through these books I have noticed something stirring in my heart.

I WANT TO FIGHT FOR MY MARRIAGE!

Not because I'm afraid it is unraveling or on the brink of destruction, but because I know that we are NOT exempt.  We will never be exempt from the daily temptations that Satan throws at marriages, and we need to live with guarded hearts, always.

So yes, I am fighting for my marriage.  Today, tomorrow and every day.  Because it is a battle worth fighting the rest of my life for.

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places."

Ephesians 6:12

IKEA Crib Hack: creating more space

All 3 of our boys share their room.
Zeke and Cai share a bunkbed and Jude has(d) his crib.

It was beginning to feel a bit crowded in their room and finding appropriate space for 3 different sizes of clothing was a constant project.

This got my wheels turning (of course it did, ha!).
The dresser that held Jude's clothes originally had 4 drawers.
Over the years 2 drawers had broken off leaving only two, to house all his diapers, socks, clothes, etc. (more on what that dresser has become next week!)

So I decided to hack his IKEA crib/toddler bed and find a way to make some extra space in their room.

By the time we got his bed he was already a strong-willed little toddler so it has always been lowered.

So here's what I did.

First, I decided that Jude was old enough to try the "big boy bed"...again, which is now a role he has owned like a champ! {for the most part}

I realize that the toddler bed setting is supposed to be lowered, but I decided to make it a toddler "loft".
I took the front railing off,
raised the mattress up to the infant/baby slot,
and drilled a couple of holes for the toddler bar to hold the mattress in place.

Now I have a place to put these cute little baskets with his clothes in it, and we have the added bonus of some freed up wrestling space for the boys.

It's a WIN WIN!

Proverbs 31:30