Resurrection Songs: "Set You An Example"

Here is the latest singable installment of Josh Via's "Resurrection Songs"

Enjoy...Download...Share!

These creative boys are in the studio today tracking Song 6 for next week as we speak:)

Heart On A String

Today, well actually last night while we were sleeping, the Orphanage where our little girl lives, received some very special visitors.

Our little Shabila got to see her Poppy and Uncle!  What a reassuring feeling it was to be able to see her in their arms...safe...happy...content...

I don't know what all the rules are for showing pictures and videos of the little girl we are adopting are, but I figure, the videos have already circulated so I'm just going to do it.  If I am instructed to take them down I will, but for now, here she is:)

Be still my heart...


***Sorry friends, I was instructed to take the videos down.  You'll just have to come visit us and we'll pop some popcorn and sip some tea and watch them over and over again, ha!***

Marriage Mantra - Part 2

Yesterday we discussed the differences between men and ladies and what each needs.

Today I'm going to outline:  

How To Handle Conflict In A Healthy Way

Communication is broken down into 3 categories:

1. 55% of communication is nonverbal (the way you act)
2. 38% of communication is the tone of your voice
3. 7% of communication is the actual conflict and problem

So, when you are handling conflict, speak the truth in love!  Be kind, compassionate and forgiving.

Here are a couple of RULES when facing conflict:

• Say it face-to-face - if you noticed, most communication can't be picked up on in an email or text.
• I Peter 3:8 - Be tender and kind
• Be found, blameless.  Remember, no one is perfect.  We all have faults, even me:)
• Say "I'm sorry", "Please forgive me", "I was wrong".  Don't wait for them to speak first!
• Be Honest: be authentic.  Make sure you fight in the right way, at the right place and at the right time.
• Remember your level of intimacy when bringing up conflict
• Be swift to hear, slow to speak

Formula For Handling Conflict

THINK - EVALUATE - RELEASE

"You cannot walk in the Spirit and be selfish"

Most marriage conflicts are due to selfishness on one, if not both, parties.

-Pastor Jimmy

"Success is never an accident.  

You are only spiritual if you choose to be. 

Hope is not a strategy.

Failure is not an option."

-Pastor Jimmy

"God gives us requirements that are not natural,

they are supernatural."

-Beverly Carroll

I just have to share one more thing.  This was my favorite "nugget" from this last session.

"Set your table as a default for your marriage"

-Pastor Jimmy and Beverly Carroll

This is how they explained this.  When you have a computer that isn't working quite right you can reformat that computer to go back to it's default settings.  You need to know what the default settings are in your own marriage.

Here are a couple of our default settings:

we will always love each other no matter what, divorce will NEVER be an option, we only have eyes for each other, we can come to each other for forgiveness, our home is a safe place, we are free to share the truth in love, Christ is the center of our marriage.

So even when Josh and I are in the heat of an argument we know what our default settings are.  We know these things are true!

Find a time when you and your spouse are at a neutral place in your relationship and set your table together!  I promise you, it will help steer your next conflict to be resolved back to your default settings:)

Robbed

I have been neglecting ECB deals at CVS for quite some time.  I've barely done enough just to keep my ECB's from expiring.  I knew it was getting bad when Josh lovingly told me that our "stash", the CVS store hiding in our bathroom linen closet, was looking pretty pathetic and it was time to go score some deals.

Still, it wasn't until I saw this status on Josh's cousin's wife's facebook page, "just robbed CVS again.  How do they stay in business?"

So, thank you Morgan for re-inspiring me to get out their and "steal" those deals again!

Started w/ 9 ECB's

Total before coupons - $44.48

Total saved: $40.38

TOTAL SPENT: $4.10

Ended w/ 8 ECB's

Man, did that feel good!

Marriage Mantra - Part 1

Josh and I had the privilege of going on the couple's retreat with our church a couple of weekends ago.  We were one of 12 couples that took the plunge to put everything else aside for a weekend to get to know our spouses on another level.  We were under great teaching from our Pastor and his wife, Beverly.

Nothing they shared was earth shattering.  They didn't claimed to have all the answers, but with all the crumbling marriages they see walk through their counseling doors, they had a lot of godly wisdom and insight to bestow.  Not to mention their own wonderful marriage to exemplify for us.

I thought I'd share a few of the main points I jotted down from the weekend.

My favorite part of the weekend was when we broke off into couples after each session, to apply what we had just learned from the Carroll's, to make it applicable in our own relationship.  It was a safe place to share frustrations.  It was a wide open door for healthy, constructive criticism, to help keep our marriage on track.

I think Josh and I have a wonderful marriage, but if I think, even for a second, that we have it all together and we don't have anything to work on, then I better be ready for a wave to knock us down, because a wave will come, when you least expect it!

 We should always be looking for ways to make our marriage better, which ironically, begins with ourselves.  Our hearts...Our motives...Our selfishness...Our demands...Our wants...Our expectations

Oh yeah, back to the things I jotted down...ahem...

The book, The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts was referenced quite a bit.  I have this book.  I've read this book.  I've re-read this book.  I highly recommend this book!

The first session was ABOUT MEN.
Not necessarily for men, but for wives to know about their men:)

MEN:  (now don't start huffing and puffing if these are not all applicable to your man, these are generalizations...so relax!)

• need of a battle to fight
• are risk takers
• need an adventure to live
• want to feel like they can rescue or make us feel rescued

MEN NEED:

• to be admired and respected -we were warned not to begin expecting instead of appreciating.  Like when Josh cleans the dishes at night.  I should never take his help for granted by just expecting it every night.  We were also encouraged to praise our husbands in public.
• sexual fulfillment - do I really need to elaborate on this one?  No?  Well, just because you said that, I think I will:)  For real, though, we all know that men need sexual fulfillment.  The temptation to find this fulfillment outside the marriage covenant grows exponentially when sex is withheld from our husbands.
• for their homes to be a refuge - I truly feel like I have created safe haven for my husband to come home to.  But like I mentioned earlier, I can always find ways to improve.  Jimmy and Beverly spoke about how they always greet each other when they come home.  I realized that I didn't really do this that often.  A lot of times I'm in the middle of finishing up a task in the office, or cooking dinner, or referreeing Cai and Zeke's new contact sport, that I neglect to even stop and look in my husbands eyes.  Or give him a welcome home kiss. Or even acknoledge that he just walked in the door.  My actions are saying that my task, or dinner, or whatever, is more important.  Is that the first thing I want my husband to feel when he walks in the door?

"Seek first to understand and then be understand"

The next session was ABOUT LADIES.
*take notes fellas!*

LADIES:

• want to be romanced - they want someone to fight for her and rescue her
• want to have a role in a great adventure - we need to feel significant
• need a "beauty" to unveil - we have a desire to unveil something beyond the ordinary

LADIES NEED:

• to be adored - showed affection, adoration value, honor.  To feel special.
• conversation - men use an average of 15,000 words a day while women use an average of 30,000.  And Josh knows as soon as he walks in the door if I've spoken to anyone else besides the kids all day or not, ha!
• security - our home is our refuge.  We find safety in knowing our man is fighting for us.  As a man, you need to just love the fear of insecurity right out of us!

__________________________________________________________
And this concludes Part 1 of Marriage Mantra.  Make sure you come back for Part 2 tomorrow.

Transplant

Our little seedlings were doing so well.

WERE doing so well.

Then I decided one day that I needed to give them a little fresh air.

I set them on the back patio for some sunshine and air.  It was a nice, warm, calm day.  I thought you were supposed to do that.  And then that night after I brought them back in for the night they started looking rather droopy.  I gave them a little to drink with some Miracle Grow to perk them back up.

Nope.  Nothing.

They started going downhill from there.  I figured, with the 10-day forecast looking lovely and the threat of frost gone I'd do the big transplant ceremony in hopes to revive these little seedlings.

Sunday afternoon was the big day.

I planted the herbs, marigolds, pumpkins and watermelons around the sides.  The rest of the seedlings went along the top of the bales in two long rows.  I also planted 2 tomato plants in the big pot on the side and a couple on the front porch.  Areyna followed behind me covering the top of the seedlings with a handful of fresh soil.

Now, let's see if we can get these seedlings to perk up a little bit.

Not Me Monday

I always place blame where it belongs.

Yup.

So when I woke up at 1:30am because someone's bass was hitting so hard it woke me up, I would never just jump to conclusions.  I never started playing the blame game because I knew it was our neighbor.  Those obnoxious kids.  I began thinking to myself "I know it's Friday night, but good grief, could you keep it down!"

Nope, not me.

So when I woke up at 3:30am because someone's bass was S.T.I.L.L. hitting so hard it woke me up A.G.A.I.N., I would never become so irritated in my soul that I'd begin actually getting angry at our neighbors.  Those obnoxious kids.  Ooohhh.

I'd never allow it to get under my skin that badly.

Nope, not me.

So when I woke up at 5:05am because someone's bass was S--T--I--L--L hitting so hard it woke me up, yet A--G--A--I--N,  I wouldn't have a sudden realization of who was really at fault, because like I said, I already knew, for a fact, that it had to be our neighbors.  Those obnoxious kids.

It didn't matter that we don't even live in a neighborhood.

It didn't matter that there are no "obnoxious kids" that live around us.

In fact, it didn't even matter that ALL of our neighbors are pretty much sweet, elderly couples in their 70's and 80's, ha!

Nope, I'd never be that silly.

Because if that were the case I might remember that WE are the only ones with obnoxious kids in our "neighborhood".  And that they had been asleep this whole time.  And then I'd be forced to think about the events that played out before going to sleep in my own house.

Nope, I never let my mind turn inward. I am never at fault.

Nope, not me!

Because then I'd remember that I had put on some nice, calm music on iTunes for Josh to come home to, because he had been out all night in a kind of stressful situation.  I'd then remember that I fell asleep before turning it off and iTunes was continuing to play not such nice and calm music throughout the night...throughout the house...on his big recording speakers...with the bass hitting so hard from artists such as Hopesfall, Israel and New Breed, John Mayer and yes, Justin Timberlake!

And that just would never happen to me.

I'm never wrong.  I'm never to blame.

Nope, not me!

I guess those obnoxious kids in our neighborhood are off the hook;)

Story In Pictures - Love In War

 A little elbow smash to the face

 Time out to talk about the day

"A little work, a little wrestle"

That's our family motto!

Fun Facts For Friday

Well my goodness, this has been a fun and exciting week on my blog, huh...
Thank you all for your encouragement and sweet words this week.  You don't know how much I needed them after reading the comment by Anonymous.  I have chosen to have a public blog, and I have chosen to speak about inner struggles and personal issues in an honest way, so I know that there are people out there that read my blog that don't necessarily agree with me...and that's okay.  It's good for me. Right? Right.  So anyway, thank you all.  I'm glad that at least the majority of my readers love me!

On a different note, did you know that:

Wild garlic is commonly mistaken as wild onion?  Yup.  This, in fact, is wild garlic.  No, there really isn't much nutritional value to it and yes you can eat it.  "But how can you tell the difference" you ask?  Well, let me just tell you.  Wild garlic has round and hollow sprigs that come out of the ground while wild onion has flat and dense ones.  So, now you know.  I just thought that was interesting.  Plus, I just wanted to post a picture of the cool looking curlycue's, ha!

Some chapsticks actually make you have to use MORE chapstick? While I was in Colorado last year my lips were extremely chapped.  My cousin actually told me to look at the ingredients on the side of my tube and look for Salicylic Acid.  Yup, it was there.  This ingredient actually strips your lips of the much-needed natural moisturizer that your lips need, which in turn is actually causing the very problem that this product is supposed to be solving.  Let me suggest using Burt's Bees Lip Balm.  My brother bought me a tube and my lips have been happy ever since:)


One of my favorite times of my day is when Josh and I wake up in the morning.  I get the music going while Josh makes the coffee, and then we sit down in our designated "Quiet Time Spots" and each spend individual time with the Lord.  I cherish this quiet time.  One of the things that makes me smile inside during this time is watching Josh search for all his "quiet time essentials".   This list isn't by any means exhaustive, but MUST include at least these items: 1 pencil, 1 pen and a stack of multicolored highlighters for his quiet time?  It's so cute to watch him crawl around on his hands and knees looking for a lost highlighter or perfect pen:)  It reminds me of the Shepherd who searched all night for the one lost sheep even though he had 99 others. *sigh*

Both Josh and I love the smell of a new book.  Next time you buy a new book or walk through a bookstore, go ahead, open one up and take a whiff...ahhhh....

Oh, and one more thing...

In case you didn't hear the new song for this week I'll post it for your listening pleasure.  I got to sing on this one:)