March and April Book Reviews

 These book reviews are going to be short-ish and sweet. One, because there are quite a few of them to cover, and two, most of these are sensitive issues, and while I don't want to shy away from what I believe to be truth based on God's word, I have no desire for internet debates over these topics.

I've mentioned before, and I will mention again, not every book I read is a book I agree with 100%. In fact, there are some authors I completely DISagree with, but that doesn't mean that I can't learn from them and gain some helpful knowledge from their perspectives.

So, without further ado...

The Secular Creed by Rebecca McLaughlin is a book "engaging five contemporary claims". I appreciated her concise feedback and I believe she accurately covered the truth and the lies in each one. I would for sure give this to my kids to read to help us engage in conversation together as it will certainly bring thought-provoking questions that can lead us back to scripture (which is always the goal!). 

Try Softer by Aundi Kolber. Aundi is a licensed therapist. She couples her own life story and events with therapeutic practices and examples to help us stop white-knuckling through life. She gives us practical tools and language to help us offer ourselves and others grace in our life journey. While this book was very helpful, I'm going to give a gentle warning. This book was HARD for me to get through. I believe these kinds of books can work as a tool for your therapist to use as they work WITH you, but simply as a helpful read for someone, ESPECIALLY with trauma in their past, this book can be triggering. I wanted to read it and get as much out of it as I could, but I also felt the need to try to finish it as quickly as I could so I could give me emotions and brain a break. Maybe it's just me, so take it or leave it, but I would suggest at least reading this WITH someone to help you process what begins stirring inside.

Does the Bible Support Same-Sex Marriage? by Preston Sprinkle. Now some of you saw the author and have already labeled me a heretic simply because I'm posting about his book. But because of this, I probably read this book more critically than any other. Now, while I am very aware of the controversy around his name, I think Preston has used this book to make a solid case for Biblical marriage being exclusively between a man and a woman. The author dives into the top 21 conversations he finds himself having with others who believe otherwise. He sets up each conversation with the summary of a specific argument FOR same-sex marriage and AGAINST different-sex marriage. He follows each summary with what he appreciates or can see within that argument, and then finally he very humbly but honestly breaks down blindspots in the argument. I appreciate his tone and humility. This is another book I would love for my kids to read in order to bring conversation back to Josh and I with questions and personal investigation.

Habits of the Household by Justin Whitmel Earley. Ok, this was the lighter read of the bunch. (I needed one of those!) I'm all about being reminded of the importance of fighting for intentional "everyday family rhythms". The book is formatted to walk you through an average day beginning with the time when you wake up and ending with bedtime. Earley introduces us to his own family liturgies he has created and invites us to make up our own. Here are a couple of my favorite quotes:

"Our best parenting comes when we think less about being parents of children and more about being children of God."

"Communing, not consuming, is the household's center of gravity."

"Don Everts and the Barna Group found in their study of Christian households that the families who were 'spiritually vibrant' shared one amazing thing in common - they had loud tables." (We've certainly got the loud table part down, ha!)

"In the American story, limits are bad. They get in the way of our freedom, which means we need to get rid of all limits to be happy. But in the story of God, limits are the way to the good life, even the way to happiness."

Talking Back to Purity Culture by Rachel Joy Welcher. Ok, this one hit some nerves. I found this book equally eye-opening, irritating, angering and helpful. What I appreciated about the book was the glimpses into some of the hurt that was caused by this movement. I honestly cannot believe some of the things that were/are actually taught and said. Some things you can tell were out of well meaning and ignorance (not that it makes these things right, just offering perspective), but some things are literally ANTI-biblical and wrong. 

What I found to be most frustrating though, was the blanket statements that the author uses as support to her claim that it was all toxic and bad. And so the pendulum continues to swing wide. Josh and I have spoken about this topic a lot together. We were personally catching the birth of this movement in our late teens, with the wake of momentum hitting our younger siblings. We have friends that were very hurt by this movement, mostly by the ultra-strict, very legalistic parents and/or leaders. On the other hand, we also see so much good that came/comes from it as a response to the raging sexual atmosphere of our age. Did the movement miss the mark in some areas? Absolutely. Could there have a been a better way to teach some things? Without a doubt. Was there anything good that we could grab ahold of and even perhaps pass on to our own kids? For sure! Again, it was good for me to read this perspective. It was NOT all roses and it is right to call out the bad and to be reminded to always, ALWAYS be in constant conversation with our kids as we bring resources to them to "help". 

On a side note, another frustration to me was that I found several contradictions within, leading me to internally ask the author, "So which is it?" And many of the examples given in the book were based on what those individuals FELT like, versus what was actually taught to them.  All that said, I did find some good takeaways as well. 

The Courage to Stand by Russell Moore. I'd never read any of Moore's books but I appreciate his wisdom and insight into politics and cultural movements that I have followed over the years. This book walks through Elijah's life as an example for how the Lord provides for us when we feel at the end of ourselves and how God's strength is what gives us courage to stand. This book had me at the introduction.

A Search For Happiness

 

I found it a bit ironic that these two books are the ones I grabbed from my stash to read next. I usually have two going at a time. One I read after my morning quiet time that is typically more heady or soul-sifting and then one leisure read while I settle down for the night.

I'm going to be completely honest. I HATE giving bad reviews, but this book by Gretchen Rubin called The Happiness Project was not my favorite at all. In fact, the last 1/3 of the book became a skim-read as I just needed to get through it. I'm not sure if it is because of the fact that it was coupled with this other book I was reading or not, but I found it hard to reconcile a focus of finding this self-gratifying illusion of happiness. The whole preface of the book was to break the year into month-long resolutions to hopefully find more overall happiness. It was an interesting experiment and you can see the things that filled the author and the things that drained her. But with each new month's goals she would say the things that would "boost" happiness or not. But that is the whole thing about happiness. It is fleeting and circumstantial and often doesn't last from one moment to the next. Or from one experience too the next. It isn't rooted in anything else but feelings and self. And that is literally what our lives naturally gravitate toward anyway. BUT, the books purpose was satisfied through the documentation of her experiment so it did what the author set out to do. After it was all said and done she said she did feel happier after that year and I feel like her biggest contribution to her own happiness was learning self-control. The one take-away I had was the reminder to live a present life and try to settle into those little things that do bring happiness and joy.

On the other hand,  Jen Othman's, Enough About Me was a cry for us to wake up to the selfish culture we find ourselves currently settling into and building homes in. A call for us to see the lies that we are enough and that we can write our own destinies. We are training our emotional pallets to "eat a steady diet of the praise of others." But the truth is, "The truth of the gospel is meant to transform us. And if it does not, then we do not really believe. The gospel has something to say about how we spend our time, where we spend our money, the goals we pursue, the careers we seek, the hobbies we enjoy the food we eat-everything. The gospel says we are not our own."

"We must be intentional about where our hearts wander, because a wandering heart has disordered loves.  It naturally gravitates toward what is seen, what is instant what is gratifying right now." And "it seems that one area of self-control in my life leads to further self-control in the other areas. And when I go out-of-bounds in one place, I go out-of-bounds elsewhere."

Bonhoeffer said: "Discipleship therefore means a...funeral of our own independence." And this is not a popular message. But man is it something worth fighting for!

One more quote from the book, but actually a quote from D.A.Carson says:

"People do not drift toward Holiness. Apart from grace-driven effort, people do not gravitate toward godliness, prayer, obedience to Scripture, faith, and delight in the Lord. We drift toward compromise and call it tolerance; we drift toward disobedience and call it freedom; we drift toward superstition and call it faith. We cherish the indiscipline of lost self-control and call it relaxation; we slouch toward prayerlessness and delude ourselves into thinking we have escaped legalism; we slide toward godlessness and convince ourselves we have been liberated."       Ouch!

This was an excellent book to recalibrate us and help us look up. 

The ONLY "Secret Trick" To Surviving Through Your Season

I have been ruminating on a recurring thought lately.

Most of you know I deal with anxiety, and most of you know, whether you deal with anxiety or not, that there are several factors that can affect the outcome of a day for an anxious person.

1. Food
2. Sleep
3. Exercise

But even if I do all the things I know I need to do to keep a clear mind and focus (get a good night's sleep, limit my caffeine, don't eat sugar or processed foods, and get a great workout in) , it isn't fool-proof.  I am still going to have days where I wake up at the top of my mental threshold and feeling as though the anxiety has already sucked all the air out of my lungs before my feet even hit the ground.

This is a daily battle for me.

There are other battles that wage war on my Joy and Peace as different seasons come and go.

Maybe for you it is dealing with your teenagers and the choices they are making.  Or maybe it is the kid(s) who will NOT stay in bed to save his life at bedtime (for the LOVE, STAY.IN.BED!).  Here's another one, maybe you are in a season where everything in your house keeps breaking (because we all know that appliances have a secret way of communicating when it's time to all go out together), or your savings and emergency fund are dwindling by the day, or you can't find a job, or your health is on the brink, or that guy you were dating turns out to be yet another loser.  Maybe life is just too crazy or the to-do list won't stop growing and life seems to be swallowing you whole.

"Don't worry," I confidently remind myself  my friends "it's just a season."  "You'll get to the other side, I promise."

With which we then go into our list of helps that may get our friend (or ourselves) through that season.

Two thoughts come to mind after catching myself repeat this phrase:

1 - What if God doesn't say "yes" to taking you out of this season?  What if The LORD has you in this spot for the rest of your life?  What then?

What if I struggle with anxiety for the rest of my entire life (which is potentially a pretty accurate conclusion, seeing as how I've dealt with it since I was 4 years old)?

2 - What exactly do we think is on the other side anyway?

Yes, we might have a brief season of rest, but that rest is only to fill us up again and prepare us for the next season.  There is ALWAYS going to be another season, even if God is gracious enough to lift us out of the previous one.

If we are just living to get through our current circumstances, believing that the other side is where all the joy and contentment are, then we are sorely misguided and will be extremely devastated when we realize that the stressors of life are exactly the same, just packaged differently in another season, on the other side.

We have neglected to see life through Eternity's eyes.

I am reading a book called Missional Motherhood by Gloria Furman where she writes:

"But these temporary helps cannot compare to the hope that we receive from considering the real long view.  The real long view is actually longer than we think.  It wasn't at the end of the ark's voyage atop miles of water.  It wasn't at the end of Sarah's barrenness.  It wasn't at the end of the Hebrews' Egyptian slavery.  It was't at the end of the conquest of Canaan.  It wasn't at the dedication of the temple.  It wasn't at the beginning of the exile' return, temple construction, or wall restoration.  The long view is not at the end of this no-good, terrible day.  Or at the end of this magically brilliant day.  It's not at the end of five years or seventy-five years.  Or five hundred years.  The long view stretches past whatever earthly ideas we have into a vision of a new world, into eternity and the new earth.  Contrary to popular opinion, when we mothers take this long view, we actually become so heavenly minded that we are of immense earthly good today.  If we want to get technical, we should say that the real long view is not actually even heavenly minded - it's new-earthly minded. We're looking forward to the consummated new creation.  Being new-earthly minded corrects our Season Obsessive Disorder.  It corrects our nearsightedness and returns our vision to God's mission to glorify his name in all the earth."

I don't know about you, but I needed to read this today.  I needed to be reminded of the LONG VIEW.  Of the WHOLE STORY!

So often I get stuck trying to parent through my current "season" with the END of that season in mind rather than eternal perspective on my lips.

Only eternal perspective will give me the grace, patience and love that I need to parent well.  Only eternal perspective will give me the contentment in the NOW.  Only eternal perspective will give me the compassion, generosity and boldness I need to share.

By all means, DO the things in your power to help get you through your current season, but don't neglect to place eternity on the horizon.

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal" 

 2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Friday Free-For-All : links to click on and devotions to begin

I CANNOT believe believe we have begun February.  In fact I just realized that Ash Wednesday is NEXT WEEK, which means its Bigger Than The Bunny Time!  If you don't have a hard copy make sure you head over and download the ebook version and then go over and get the songs (one day we'll finish the last 2.  Life kind of happened rapidly around this point as we worked on adding two more littles to the Colony.)

I had the privilege of leading worship with my hubby at the SEBTS GO conference last weekend.  The spirit was thick and moving and it was an honor to be a part of it!  Here is one of the songs we did:
GO Conference Worship: O Praise the Name - Lead by Josh Via from Southeastern Seminary on Vimeo.

This month is a HUGE month for a couple of products that I am pretty passionate about.

Young Living's starter kit is 10% off this month.  Make sure you head over to my YL site and put your order in before this deal runs out.  (PS- you only have a few more hours to add onto my monthly order so if you are wanting the wholesale price without signing up let me know so I can add your oils onto my order!)

Next up is Norwex.  I actually just took advantage of their February sign-up for FREE incentive.  I was asking my sister-in-law (who sells this stuff like its going out of business!) if she could tell me how to get the dusting mitt.  (the dust in the Colony casa is OUT OF CONTROL!).  She told me that it actually came in the jump starter kit, along with a handful of other amazing products.  All you have to do is pay the $10 shipping fee, no strings attached, no sales required!  And I said, I'm in!  So if you love the products and want to be able to buy yours at a discounted price head on over here and sign up, or just look around and order some of your own products to see for yourself how amazing they are!

I know, short and sweet blog post today but I just finished  putting on a pot of chicken bone broth, eating up a couple of eggs my chickens just laid this morning, and am heading outside to begin my pallet fence around my soon-to-be-garden.

What have I become?!

Happy Friday friends!

Climbing In The Wheelbarrow

"Perhaps we are all in the position of the man in Morton Kelsey's story who came to the edge of an abyss.  As he stood there wondering what to do next, he was amazed to discover a tightrope stretched across the abyss.  And slowly, surely, across the rope came an acrobat pushing before him a wheelbarrow with another performer in it.  When they finally reached the safety of solid ground, the acrobat smiled at the man's amazement.  'Don't you think I can do it again?' he asked.  And the man replied, 'Why yes, I certainly believe you can.'  The acrobat put his question again, and when the answer was the same, he pointed to the wheelbarrow and said, 'Good!  Then get in and I will take you across.'"

When I read this excerpt in Brennan Manning's book, The Ragamuffin Gospel, my heart literally leapt in my chest.

Am I going to be a person that believes everything the Bible says about our miraculous savior but refuses to put it to test in my own life?  Do I truly believe that He can "do it again" and do it in my own life?  And if I do believe am I going to put my vocal belief into action and jump in the wheelbarrow, handing all control over to Him?  Do I even WANT Him to take me on that journey, or have I become so complacent that I am happy watching him carry everyone else across?

"What we do with the lordship of Jesus is a better indication of our faith than what we think.  

This is what the world wants from our rhetoric, what the man of God longs for in shepherds - 

daring enough to be different, 

humble enough to make mistakes, 

wild enough to be burnt in the fire of love, 

real enough to make others see how phony we are."

-Brennan Manning

If Sin Is Sin, Then Sin Is Sin

"The way we see other people is usually the way we see ourselves.  

If we have made peace with our flawed humanity and embrace our ragamuffin identity, 

we are able to tolerate in others what was previously unacceptable in ourselves."

I read this convicting sentence the other day from Brennan Manning.

It keeps playing back and forth, back and forth in my head.

Different scenarios began playing through my head of times when I've caught myself judging other people.
It's almost  absolutely embarrassing when I actually took the time to list out the things that frustrate me...or even DISGUST me, in other people.
Other people God has created in His own image.
Other adopted children of Christ.

It's so easy to see other people's flaws and thank God that we aren't the one with that lifestyle, or that addiction, or that reaction or that way of thinking...

(Sound familiar? Luke 18:9-14)

But are those things really any different than my own sins that I deal with?  Have I really owned up to my own flaws and sins that grieve the Holy Spirit, that keep me from crawling into Abba's lap and spending vulnerable, heart and soul-changing time with Him?

Sure, every sin has different consequences and affects different people, but Romans 5  tells us that even a simple THOUGHT of a sinful act is sin!

Billy Graham defines sin as "any thought or action that falls short of God's will."

So if my sin of being short-tempered with my 9-year-old, or sarcastic or demeaning to my 6-year-old is just as sinful (falling short of God's will) as the drug addict down the street, then we are equal sinners.

If my tendency for impulsivity overcomes me and turns into sin, and is the same as the individual who has an addiction to porn or lust, then we are equal sinners.

When my lack of self-control over food (yes, if it's around I can hardly hold myself back!) becomes an idol and gluttonous it is the same sin as the individuals who are addicted to over-exercise and obsession over body image.

And if we are equal sinners (both just as far apart from Christ as the other), it takes the same amount of grace and love to bring us back to His presence.

"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

Romans 3:23

I know for me, if I remember who I am, and what God has sacrificed for ME, and the grace and patience he floods me with on a daily hourly basis, I am more likely to give grace when someone sins against me.  They don't deserve that forgiveness.  They don't deserve that second chance...or that third chance, or that fourth chance...

...but neither do I.

(BTW-forgiveness doesn't make their sin ok.  It doesn't make MY sin okay.  But it does make the forgivers heart ok.)

I don't EVER want God's grace and lavished love to ever become stagnant in my life.  Because that is when my love and forgiveness and grace (and compassion) for others ends.  And that, my friend, is sin, that will once again separate me from the one who lavishes it on me.

"Then Peter came up and said to him, 

'Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him?'  

Jesus said to him, 

'I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.'"

Matthews 18:21-22

This is a command.  

It does not change with different seasons and circumstances that we face.

If you believe that God's word is ALL TRUTH, then it does not change.  

It is what it is.  

It is WHO God is.  

And if we call ourselves followers of Him, then it HAS TO BE who WE are.

The Magic Minute - 3:30pm

Our Squad just read a book called "Hands Free Mama" by Rachel Stafford.  I have to admit that it wasn't my favorite book of all times, but there were definitely some step-on-your-toes moments.  I was also able to take away a few tips that will become a normal part of my routine as a mama living a more intentional life.  I'd like to share one of them with you.

You know when "they" tell you that in order to get good sleep you need to start winding down your day (and body) 30 minutes to an hour before actually getting in bed?  That means getting off electronics and putting the final touches on the to-do list for the next day.  These small actions help you mentally unwind, allowing your body to become more relaxed, making it easier to fall asleep peacefully.

While reading this book I was prompted to think through my day at some of the most stressful times in my day, and for me it is the time between the kids getting home from school and the time dinner finally gets placed on the table.  I have 4 kids to help with homework while browning the ground beef, snacks to juggle while cooking the rice, papers to sign while chopping the veggies, folders to empty while scraping the bottom of the pan that I just burned from the overly-browned ground beef (I really have an issue with multitasking stove-top activities and anything else;), and...Jude to manage.  I tend to start commanding instead of asking, talking loudly instead of tenderly, and getting unrealistically impatient.

I decided that I wanted to try to eliminate some of those not-so-good mama moments by being a little more proactive prior to the kids rushing the backdoor demanding their favorite snack.  So I gave myself a mental cut-off time to begin winding myself down and getting ready for the Colony and the needs they have for their mama.

For me, the time is 3:30pm.
This gives me a good 15-20 minutes to unwind mentally from the tasks I've been pouring into and shift to the next part of my day.  Meaning, less distractions and more intentional focus on the kids.

I CANNOT be in the middle of a deep post, or balancing the dwindling bank account, or settling insurance claims on the phone and expect to be mentally capable of being the mom I need to be when the kids get home from school, so I need to plan accordingly.

I want to be finished with projects by 3:30 or at least getting to a stopping place.
I want to have as much dinner prep done by that time as well.
I try to have the house picked up enough so I'm not tripping over toys before 4 more Colony kids walk through the door, adding to the chaos.

At 3:30 I want to be winding down and mentally preparing for the second half of the day.
This isn't always feasible but it is the goal that I work toward every day.  And I don't always make it a priority and it is on those days that I pay for it in meltdowns by everyone involved, including me!

This time not only helps ME but it gives the kids an easier afternoon because their mom is typically more mentally and emotionally present.  Plus it allows Jude and I some snuggle time on the hammock as we wait for the kids to walk through the field:).

Do you have a time(s) in the day where you can almost count on the blood pressure rising or the panic setting in from being overwhelmed or completely stressed out?  Maybe you can set up some boundaries for yourself to help eliminate the distraction to be able to focus on what is important at that specific time.

Book Worm

I am in the middle of several books again.
No, I don't have time to read each of them everyday, and thankfully some of them are with groups so I only need to read 1 chapter a week, but man is my brain taking in a lot these days!

I thought I'd share the good reads I'm in the middle of for those of you looking for something to inspire.

"Spirit Hunger" by Gari Meacham.
This book came at just the right time and is chalk full of life altering perspective on the power of the Holy Spirit and our response to Him.

"Hands Free Mama" by Rachel Macy Stafford
I'm reading through this one with my Squad.  In an effort to live in the moment, while still living a "relevant" life, we chose this book to help us balance it all.  It has been EXCELLENT so far.  I love how it isn't "anti-devices" or social media, but helps us gain an eternal perspective for the real-live people right in front of us as we put healthy boundaries in place for everything else.

"Give Them Grace" by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson
I can't rave enough about this one.  OK, well I have only just begun reading, but it had me hooked by the time I finished the forward and introduction!  I am reading this along with my co-writers over at KITW.  The writers graciously tear the vail between moral behavior and Christ-focused heart-change. I don't know about you, but I don't want an outwardly obedient child who rejects Jesus inwardly.  I want to flood them with the awareness of God's grace as it infiltrates my own life and then let it wash over the way I parent.

I will be writing on Chapters 4 and 9.  So make sure you go grab your copy and jump into the discussion!

Force Quit and Restart ~ A Lesson On Gratitude

I don't know what it was about Saturday, but SOMETHING was off.  Something was TERRIBLY off!

Josh and I were trying to quickly get ready for the day in order to herd the Colony to the local Dollar Tree to shop for our Christmas Shoeboxes.

But instead of the smiley, happy-hearted kids preparing the boxes that you see on those Samaritan's Purse commercials, picture a bunch of kids (5 to be exact) who cannot keep from greedily bickering and fighting over their own multitude of toys, how to play "spy" the RIGHT way, and how long it will take to get a turn with the desired toy.

It wasn't even just the kids.  I had been asked to get my Christmas list together for the extended family.  In my mind I was all, "I don't need anything.  I'm not going to ask for much.  I have so much stuff."  But as my list kept growing I realized just how greedy I was!

The last straw was when we checked out at the $1 store and the nice cashier gifted each of our kids with a brand spanking new marker of their very own.  Not one for the community Colony art center in the dining room, but for their own use, for whatever the heck they wanted to use it for (minus the walls and furniture of course, ha!).  But, Mr. Cai got in his head that he was entitled to a green marker, instead of the other 5 colors that had been freely given to us.

The commotion that followed was more than embarrassing and resulted in one marker in the trash and a tear-stained Cai-bo with nothing to color with.

Josh and I had had enough of the ungratefulness.
Enough of the entitlement complex.
Enough of the greed.
Enough of the selfishness.
Enough.

Last year I read a book called "7" which dramatically impacted my life.  I had been wanting to implement something like this for a long time with our family.  With Josh reading a book along the same vein called, Freedom of Simplicity this semester with school, he was beginning to feel the same way and NOW seemed to be the perfect time!

On the way home from the Dollar Tree we began mapping out our plan.

We decided to stick with the "7" theme.

I mentally began going through the things in our home and wrote down the specific things we were going to sift through.

the family meeting...BEFORE the tears

We talked about how we were going to present it to the Colony.  It was NOT supposed to be a punishment, but an act of sacrifice in order to get our hearts and attitudes right.  It was going to take some teamwork from all of us to choose the things that were the most practical for our family.  In the beginning of this me-centered season I struggle through every year, we couldn't have picked a better time for this.

Here are the rules for our experiment:

• we have to do this as a family
• we have to use teamwork to choose the items to keep
• Girls got to choose ~ 7 Barbie items (whether it was the playhouse, dolls, car, pony, furniture or the dolls themselves), 7 baby dolls/stuffed animals, 7 baby doll items (clothes, diaper bag items, etc.), 7 toy items (costumes, tea set, rainbow loom, etc.)
• Boys got to choose ~ 7 costumes, 7 cars, we kept the entire train set out for Jude since that's his only real toy, 7 superhero items (laid out like the girl's Barbies), 7 stuffed animals, 5 toy guns (one for each kid)
• Josh ~ whittled down his clothing to five button up shirts, 2 pairs of pants and a few T-shirts and sweaters
• Tasha - whittled down my clothing (but I'm still trying to look sexy for my husband and I've been working on my accessorizing.  That probably sounds ridiculous, but I am no fashionista and this is a goal of mine.  For example, I've been wearing the same earrings since 10th grade!), 7 social media checks a day (I do a lot on social media for theColonyShop)
• 7 dinner meals to choose from
• 70 minutes of TV a week
• In addition to getting rid of the excess we are adding things like reading times and a thankful tree

This experiment will run from now until after Christmas.  We promised to keep everything stored away.  This is not to purge and throw away all our stuff, but more to help us realize how much we really do have and how desperately we are blessed!

We are fighting as a family against feelings of entitlement and greediness. 

I'd like to say that our kids were happy to oblige to the experiment and all that it entailed, but that would be a lie!  One particular Colony member was devastated.  He could hardly contain himself.  It was downright miserable hearing and watching him that afternoon, but we stayed calm and kept encouraging him.  The girls had quite a time picking out their favorites that they could agree on.  Oh, the tears were flowing on Saturday.

"someone" running away to hide from this madness:(

I'm happy to say, though, that 4 days in and there are no more tears.  The kids haven't asked once to get any item down from the attic.  Cleanup around the house is a piece of cake at nighttime, and the kids have spent hours running around the house imaging and pretending, when they aren't playing with the trains and 7 cars:).  I've heard much more cooperation and "thanks mom".

I've decided that I'm going to keep a record of our experiment progress for you all to read.  I'd love to hear of anybody else doing something similar.

We don't have to give in to the consumerism and entitlement that seems to be handed out here in America.  We can fight it.  YOU can fight it!

Fighting For My Marriage: Book Reviews Of Current Reads

I have been inundated with marriage books lately.  I'm not sure why they have been falling in my lap over the past couple of months but I'm not complaining.

I just finished up a book called, For Women Only, by Shaunti Feldhahn.  Wow, what an eye-opening, excellent book.  Most of the contents of the book I had known already, or at least had heard of, but the thing I loved about it is the fact that it gives scientific facts and data that back it all up, as well as multiple studies and interviews by men of all ages and walks of life.

I'm telling you, if this book doesn't rock your world and give you more compassion, love and respect for your husband, and the other men around you, I don't know what will!  I would encourage EVERY woman to read this book.  It's not only for the married woman, but for the singles out there as well.  It will give you some much needed insight into the lives and mentality of a man that will help you support and encourage them, as you walk beside them on their journey for purity.

The other book that I am now in the middle of is called, Kiss Me Like You Mean It, by Dr. David Clarke.  I'm only a few chapters in, but just the intro had me hooked, and laughing my butt off at the reality of the woman/man dynamics he portrays.

The thing is, I don't view my marriage as falling apart or struggling.  I think Josh and I do a fairly decent job at communicating our wants, needs and struggles (which I couldn't have said about 12 years ago, ha!).  He is, by far, my best friend.

But on the other hand, I know that no marriage is perfect (that's exactly what Satan wants you to believe, so he can swoop in at any given weak moment and destroy it all!) .  Josh and I are far from perfect people.  As a matter of fact, we are sinful, selfish people, but we have committed to do life together, even through the stresses of daily foolish choices, mistakes, financial crisis, communication breaches and demanding children.

As I wade through these books I have noticed something stirring in my heart.

I WANT TO FIGHT FOR MY MARRIAGE!

Not because I'm afraid it is unraveling or on the brink of destruction, but because I know that we are NOT exempt.  We will never be exempt from the daily temptations that Satan throws at marriages, and we need to live with guarded hearts, always.

So yes, I am fighting for my marriage.  Today, tomorrow and every day.  Because it is a battle worth fighting the rest of my life for.

"For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places."

Ephesians 6:12

Summer Reads

After my Hunger Games reading frenzy earlier this summer I kind of took it easy in the reading department.  Add in the pallet wood that NEEDS to be made into something fun and FREE in my home, and the sympathy purging that goes into helping a friend(s) move from house to house, I've been busy in other ways.  Oh yeah, and I have FIVE kids, ha!

All that to say, I've had some people ask for book recommendations.  Two of these I've completed, 1 and am re-reading from years ago and the other is just something different to add to my quiet time in the morning.

"Say Goodbye to Survival Mode"

by Crystal Paine

Excellent, fun, easy, practical read on re-prioritizing your life, time finances and goals.

"God Loves Ugly"

by Christa Black

This book was a little heavy and brutally honest, but so needed in this culture and for all generations.

Deals with fighting through addictive behaviors and thinking, getting past your past

and becoming comfortable in the person God made you.

"The Power of a Praying Wife"

by Stormie Omartian

There is definitely some cheese in this book, but how can you deny a book that can get you praying for your husband.  Saved or unsaved, our husband needs our prayers and this book lays out a plan focusing on 30 different areas to pray for our husbands about.

"Holy Spirit Power"

by Charles Spurgeon

I've never read any of Spurgeon's writing, but I am certainly a fan now!

This little book is chalk full of little nuggets to tuck away or meditate on.

I am going to be reading some more of his writing soon!

And that, my friends, is all I've got, but I'll be diving deep into some new reads this fall

and will share them with you soon!

My Pain and Your Pain, NOT My Pain VS. your Pain

I have been fighting for over a year now with something and it didn't hit me until JUST NOW, while reading THIS BOOK, that I have been going about it all wrong!

As many of you know, last year I said goodbye to two of my dearest friends/sisters as they packed up their families and moved to Uganda and Haiti, saying "yes" to God.

Then the posts started coming in of their lives (and hardships) as they fought to find a new normal for their families.

I remembered our very short stint living in Uganda...
the spotty electricity
the cold water
the climate
no air conditioning
no fast food
no familiar faces or smells
optional use of clocks ;)
the sickness with no medical care

But here I sat, in my air conditioned living room, on my powered laptop, after getting a long warm shower while dinner sat cooking in my crock pot, feeling guilty.

Guilty for being able to live with these pleasures and conveniences
Guilty for having a tough day
Guilty for feeling worn down or tired
(BTW-THEY never made me feel guilty...EVER. It was my own doing. My own thinking. My own comparison of my own life to theirs.)

In my head I told myself, "what right do I have to complain about MY life!"

But then I read this quote by Christa Black today: "Pain, is pain, is pain, is pain."

What right do I have to compare my pain with others?

And I think it is imperative to add, the thinking goes both ways. (It's very easy to fall into the victim mentality, thinking that nobody else's problems could ever be as bad as ours, leaving no room for compassion for others and what they are going through.)

I have no right to compare my child's sickness to the sickness of someone else's child.
I have no right to compare my bad day with someone else's.
I have no right to compare how I feel with the way someone else feels.

Likewise, I have no right to compare my hardships with those of my acquaintances who don't seem all that difficult (to me).

Because they are INCOMPARABLE.

You can't compare apples and oranges.
You can't compare pain with pain.

Yes, there should be a healthy dose of perspective,

but if your child is sick, they are sick and it doesn't matter what they have, you are a mom fighting through the pain with them

and if you are a mama, it doesn't matter if you have 1 kid, 3 kids or 8 kids, being a mama is hard work. Sure, it's a different kind of hard work, but the struggle is real in every case.

Your pain is your pain.
It sucks and, at times, it feels as though you may not see the end of it.

My pain is my pain.
And it sucks.
And many times I feel as though I may not see the end of it.

So, let's encourage each other through this journey called life, no matter how petty and silly we might sound to someone else...

because "pain, is pain, is pain, is pain."

YOUR Best Stuff

I'm reading a new book called "Say Goodbye to Survival Mode" by Crystal Paine.  You have probably heard of her.  She created the blog Money Saving Mom and I referred to her a TON when I first began the road to affordable grocery shopping when I lived in Charlotte.  It's kind of cool because she is writing about the time in life when I was actually reading her life fleshed out on her blog.  I remember the exact transitions she was going through that she refers to in this book.

OK, enough about that:)

The entire first part of the book is about prioritizing our lives.  We are getting specific here people.  4-5 top priorities that should be taking up our time and then subcategorizing what that entails.  Then weeding out the rest of the things that suck the time and energy right out of us (because let's face it, many times we feel drained and unmotivated because we are trying to do things that don't fit in these categories).

Today she challenged us to dig deep and think about the things that we are good at.
the things that energize us
the things that make us feel alive
the things that motivate us to get up in the morning

Not the things we WISH we could do.
or the things we see other moms/wives/women doing that we feel like we should be good at
or the things we used to be able to do before we had kids
or the things we could do if only we could have kids
or the things we want to do but just don't have the time for

I think so often we see everyone around us when we begin exercises like this.
I see my friend who takes beautiful photos of everything all around her.
I see another who knows everything medical under the sun.
Or the one who can work outside the home while gracefully juggling the rest of her life.
How about the ones who can sew or make food from scratch
Or have the patience and gift to homeschool their kids.
And then there is my designer friend who can design anything from NOTHING.  She makes bathrooms look like ballrooms, ya'll.  AMAZING talent!

Oh my goodness...if I stayed here long enough I would be a very depressed women, full of feelings of inadequacy and failure.

But when we do this we are making what I like to call Gift/Talent Stew.  We are grabbing everybody's best and putting it together thinking that somehow we are supposed to be able to do it ALL.

But here's the cool thing.  God made us all different.  (I know my husband is grateful for this.  The world can only handle one of me, ha!)  I can do things that YOU have a difficult time doing, or cannot do at all, or don't even care to do for that matter.  And so can YOU!

Arrogant?
Not in the least!

It reminds me of the passage in the Bible where it describes His Church as a body.  Everyone has their own purpose in the body and we work together to make it work.  I think this could apply here as well (although completely taken out of context:)

I am finally realizing the things that I am good at because of the way God made me.
I am an empathizer so encouraging other people brings life to me and speaks truth to them.
I love to write.  It helps me organize my thoughts.  It is a mental and emotional outlet for me.  I love to go back through and look at my kid's past through the words I've documented during certain times.
I love music.  Making music. Listening to music. Creating music. Worshiping through music.
I love my new jewelry shop. I love hammering out meaningful memories both for people I love and people I've never even met.
I love creating environments in my home and organizing and finding good deals, so finding ways to decorate my home on a dime is super fun for me.

I would encourage you to take time to do this for yourself.
Make it a practice to look at the things in your life through this lens.

Find YOUR best stuff and rock it!

"Thou Shalt Not Judge" ~ Forcing myself to answer life's tough questions about...myself

Sometimes I like to read.

I go through stages.  

Sometimes I REALLY like to read.  Bible, fiction, non-fiction, kids books, commentaries, ANY and everything.

Sometimes I NEED to read.

Sometimes I don't feel like reading but am prompted to keep going with a book because I know there is something in it for me.

I am toward the end of a really good read called, She's Gonna Blow! Real help for moms dealing with anger.  

What a book.  I have to admit...I had a problem with the title.  Besides the obvious first-response giggle fit after actually saying the name out loud, ha!;)  I honestly never felt as though I dealt with anger issues with my kids.

But after the 5-6 months of living in mental and emotional hell this book couldn't have come at a better time.

A lot of times I read books like this but when I get to the little application questions at the end of each chapter I skip over them and keep going.  But for some reason I told myself that I wasn't allowed to do that with this book.  I was going to allow this book to seep into every pore of my being.  I was going to allow God to use the words in this book and un-peal the layers and layers of baggage that have made up the mom that I am.  The good, the bad, the ugly.

Anyway, today the question I made myself respond to was this:

"Why do you think women (mothers) feel like they have to look like they have it all together?  

Who puts this pressure on us?  Other women and mothers?  Society?  Religion?  Ourselves?"

My answer was an overwhelming ME!

I judge ME.

I believe that I do feel pressure from other moms and society on occasion, but mostly, I feel like I have set up parameters in my own mind of how things ought to be done and if I fall short I am not being the mom I need to be.

Aren't I supposed to read to my kids EVERY DAY, multiple times a day?

Am I not a good mother unless I can juggle all these kids, and their schooling, and their extracurricular activities with ease.  All while providing the lowest priced, healthiest picked food to fill their bellies that NEVER seem to get filled.

I'm not supposed to cry happy tears, sad tears, tears at ALL.

I'm not supposed to feel overwhelmingly pained by the happenings all around me (sickness, homelessness, death, friends moving away, adoptions on the brink of falling a part, families on the edge of fall-out.

A good mother NEVER raises her voice, or argues with her 4-year-old.

She certainly never flips out over things like her 9-year-old's brilliant idea of cleaning out the guinea pig cage on the floor of her bedroom or the misuse of the power cord for the ipad as a sling shot rubber band.

She always has eternity and perspective evenly weighed out.

But when I set up parameters like these I don't allow myself to be who God has made me.

I'd rather create things with my kids than read with them.  And that's ok.  

Overactivity stresses me out.  God created me to need a lot of white space.  A LOT of white space.

I am a very PASSIONATE person.  I FEEL others peoples pain and hurt, more than the average person I believe.  And God made me that way! I just have to learn to balance that with the peace God has to offer.

I do raise my voice, partly because there are so many dang kids in my house that they can't hear me above their own voices, ha!  But I do get frustrated sometimes.  Doesn't everybody if they are honest?  But I am also very quick to apologize when I get out of line.

I am a woman of order.  Everything has a purpose and a place and when things get done differently I tend to get a little on edge.  God made me that way, so I am learning to be okay when someone else does something differently than I would do.  I'm learning.  I'm learning.  I think I'll ALWAYS be learning this one.

I constantly pray that the Lord would give me eternal perspective in my seemingly chaotic life.

Today the commandment, "thou shalt not judge" is being applied in my life, FOR my life.  I cannot judge the person God has made me.  Instead I will pray for balance in the areas that can so quickly move in an ungodly direction  and pray for the desire to be the mom He has created me to be, even if it looks differently that what I have pictured it to be.

A Download, A Discount Code and Something Way More Fulfilling Than Chocolate

So I have this amazing friend,

who knows a whole lot of stuff that makes me go "hmmmm" (as in, I have NO CLUE!).

She is passionate about kids and growing them up in the word.  You need to go check out her great resources at Kids In The Word.

Anyway, she encouraged me to revise my family devotional and make it into an ebook for easy access to busy moms and families (or maybe those families who don't have a single space for one more book in their house).  I said, "I don't have a clue as to how I would even begin!"  And she said, "Um, hello, that's what I'm awesome at!"

Well, she didn't really say that, but she did tell me what I needed to get to her in order for her to work her awesomeness and make this thing happen:)

So, for those of you who have been asking for a quick way to get a copy of the devotional because THIS IS THE FIRST WEEK, here it is.

And it get's even better!

If you enter the code Bunny2Off you can get a $2 discount at checkout until March 16th!

So here is what you need to do...

1. go check out KidsInTheWord
2. then go download So Much Bigger Than The Bunny at the "KidsInTheWord" site OR
3. at the amazon Kindle store HERE
4. download the Resurrection Songs that go along with the book
5. bring this Easter season to life with your family!

Friday Free-For-All

Today is the first day in a long time that I haven't felt like I'm in a haze.
My mind is clear and focused.
My heart isn't racing for no apparent reason.
My fingertips aren't going numb and my legs don't feel like Jell-O.
My anxiety has vanished, just as quickly as it came storming in.

Deep breathes.
The silence isn't consuming.
The storm outside isn't depressing.
Contentment is here.

Nothing has changed.
But that's anxiety.
Sometimes there are definite triggers that set it off.
Sometimes, a lot of times, it's just nothing.

I have a dear friend who sent me a bunch of quotes about anxiety and depression.  This particular one has sung true for me...

"I yearned to get better; I told myself I was getting better. 

In fact, the depression was still there, like a powerful undertow. 

Sometimes it grabbed me, yanked me under; other times, I swam free."

The season on Lent is right around the corner.  I have a friend who is working on making So Much Bigger Than The Bunny into an ebook.  But for now, if you are interested in buying it you can go HERE.  Make sure you download the songs that go along with it HERE.

With the kitchen done(ish), the dining room complete and the living room finished (I'll post pictures of that later) I have decided to take a break and just enjoy what we have accomplished so far!  It's kind of nice to have those painting projects under out belt.  I can't wait to redo our countertops in the kitchen and fix the flooding issues in the basement:)

I had another idea for the ColonyShop.  A charm bracelet called "The Ebenezer Bracelet".  You can add different charms to it to signify key moments and monuments that God has brought you through.  Each disc would stand for something different.  Maybe it's just special moments you have walked through like the birth of a baby, your wedding day, the day you got saved, or a season marked with hurt or pain that you found yourself tested through.  Who wants to be my first test subject!  The bracelet with 1 charm will be $10 and then add an extra dollar for each additional charm/memory.

Ok, this rain is making me tired so I gotta get up and move around a little bit.
Happy Friday ya'll!

Inappropriate Panic

As a child who struggles with anxiety, Zeke has inherited my "gift" of abundant tears.  Any number of things can bring on the waterworks on any given day, no matter how hard we try to hold them in.

I am getting better at controlling my emotions in my old age, but Zeke is still learning.

When he begins falling a part over little things like Cai looking at him the wrong way, or a missing shoe, or the Lego car that fell resulting in a missing missile, we calmly tell him, "Zeke, those are inappropriate tears".

We're trying to teach him to logically think through the real reason for the hysteria and talk himself off the ledge with reason and perspective.

But did you know that a lot of us live in this realm, and most of us don't even know it!

Sure, you may not cry over every little thing, but you hit the panic button on life, causing you, and everyone around you, to dive into scurry mode.

I'm reading a book called "The Time of Your Life" by Susie Davis.  It is an excellent read! (I got it for $.01 on Amazon BTW).

The chapter I read today was titled, "the trap of inappropriate panic".  Boy did it hit the mark on women of this generation.

We tend to hit the panic button from everything to straightening up the house for a guest to trying to get out of town for a "fun" family vacation.

Not only are we creating an unpeaceful environment for those around us, but we are "training up a child in the way he should go" and that way is completely inappropriate!    For example, if my kids see a stressed out mom all the time, where every little thing is cause for scurry and panic, they will think that it's normal to act that way and most likely fall into those same unhealthy patterns as an adult.

Susie asks us the question, "Do you leave your hurrying and scurrying for real emergencies or do you live in the hysterics of a tornado lifestyle, driven on by a skewed perspective."

If we live life in panic mode, and then wonder why we are stressed out all the time, we could probably use a hefty dose of perspective...and maybe we could ask someone to remind us that "that is inappropriate panic" to help talk us off the ledge:-)

Just Because Summer Is Over Doesn't Mean The Reading Has To End

I just finished reading three great books over the last couple of weeks.

The first one was Fit To Burst by Rachel Jankovic.  I love everything Rachel writes.  She writes with such whit and ease.  Her chapters are short, easy to read and full of biblical truth and wisdom.  I always read her books so quickly because as soon as I finish a chapter I just want to get a glimpse at what the next one is about and don't realize I've been sucked in until I've completed another!

Next on the summer reading list was a book that was recommend by many friends and family around us called When Helping Hurts: how to alleviate poverty without hurting the poor...and yourself by: Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert.  This book has been very controversial in the Christian circles.  I agree  with many of the ideas and principals they are seeking to form around the poverty stricken people in the world, but I did find myself disagreeing with some specific things that I feel are God-given convictions for me.  I certainly do not believe that the guidelines in this book are the ONLY ways of accomplishing ministry (sometimes ministry happens FAST and decisions have to be made quickly leaving no time to set up the "system" they believe is the best way to do things.  I also don't believe that all "help" needs guidelines and prerequisites.), but this book has been a great resource for us over the past several weeks.  Last month the Lord handed our family a life interruption.  Josh met a homeless mother and daughter who were about to spend another night in their car.  Josh called me and told me their situation and immediately God gave us both a peace about them coming to stay with us that night.  Over the next 4 weeks we lived life together as they made our living room their home.  We provided shelter, food, a loving family atmosphere (man was the accountability of ALWAYS having someone watching great for the patient tone of voice I'd been needing to work on with my kids) and the love of Christ as we walked alongside them to help find a solution for their situation.  I'm quite certain we didn't do everything right, I mean, we'd never been in this situation before, but I believe we did what the Lord had called us to do.  This book helped open our eyes to specific directions in this fragile relationship that we needed to take.  So I'd say, read with an open mind, but read none-the-less.

Lastly, my Squad (that would be TRIAD with 4 members, who asked another to be a part of it, then one moved to Uganda and another soon-to-be member moved into town leaving us with 6 and who wants to say Sextet, so we kept it Squad...I digress) and I read through Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson's Desperate.  Instead of telling you how awesome this book is and how much EVERY woman needs to read this book, no matter what stage of life she is in I'm just going to write down a few of my favorite quotables from the book.

"A wise woman is one who copies wise women."

"We need advocates, someone who goes to bat for you, who watches out for you and protects you.  That person is on your side and wants the best for you...Going at it alone is, without a doubt, one of the most common and effective strategies that Satan uses to discourage moms.  Ecclesiastes 4:10 says, 'But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.'"

"No matter how wonderful a man may be, he is not crafted by God to meet all of a woman's needs."

"Rules, laws and boxes tend to kill the soul when it comes to expectations of motherhood."

"Give yourself to them [your children] without rush...let them know that you are on their team; that you are for them and not against them; that you will forgive, always, just as the Father forgives."

"What other people think of our path is irrelevant."

"A happy mom, who is secure in herself and at ease in her life is a rare gift that children love and appreciate."

"Children do not thrive with authoritarian, perfectionistic parenting, because they can never live up to perfection. And neither can you."

"many have not understood that the home is a battlefield where sin and selfishness must be overcome, and that the taming, subduing, and civilizing of a home will be a woman's honor."

"I believe that if moms understood how strategic their roles were in this battle for the hearts and minds of the next generation, they would grow in excitement about the great job God created them to fulfill."

"Wrong expectations produce anger and depression."

And that's just within the first 4 chapters!

I've got another round of books going that I'll share with you when I complete.

Happy reading!

As Much As I Like To Be Organized...

I'm reading yet another book.  I'm am in a season where I just can't get enough!  Don't worry, these seasons never last long, but I try to take advantage of the times I actually get the urge to pick up a book.
(My mom is probably sitting at her computer with her jaw wide open in shock!)

This book is the follow-up to a book I read last year called "Loving The Little Years" by Rachel Jankovic.

Talk about step-on-you r-toes honesty and spirit-lead conviction!  The basis is the foundation of loving and sacrificing.  When you feel at the end of your patience, your creativity, yourself, think of ways to invest in others.  Because "when we imitate Christ, we want to give what costs us much, and we want to give it freely".

Anyway, I wanted to highlight just a few of my favorite things so far.  (I'm only on Chapter 3:)

1 - "Being a mother changes your role in the world...There is a difference between giving something and having it taken from you.  If you still count the things that you lost with resentment, then you did not give them.  You need to let go of those things that you no longer have.  Lay them down.  If you find yourself in bed at night tallying what has been lost to you, then you need to let go of that list.  Lay them down.  Give them freely.  Don't count them as stolen."

2 - "The love of Christ is not the reason that we don't have to do things.  It is the reason we get to do things freely."  This is speaking of the parable of the talents in Matthew 25.  "If your Master gave you gold, you should not be sitting on it."

3 - On making sacrifices and provisions for your family: "We want to know, within the next fifteen minutes, that everyone saw what we sacrificed, acknowledged it gratefully, thanked us profusely, reflected on it quietly, and came up with a way to repay us. But God thinks in much, much bigger story lines."  We need to look to Christ for our fulfillment and satisfaction and give freely, just as He did.  "We should be doing it so freely that we don't remember it."

4 - "When you are a mother and a homemaker, you are your own boss.  The days are what you make of them.  The tasks that need to get done are put on a list at your discretion.  This means that you must be leadership material.  At the same time, what you get done is up to you, too...making you a hardworking employee...Making a list that you cannot accomplish does not make you a better housewife, it makes you a bad leader.  Snarking at yourself just makes you a bad leader who is also mean."

Along these same lines (I wish I could just copy this whole chapter!) she talks about how she would get irritable with her kids when trying to get through her list, but "It doesn't matter what is on the table when the people around it aren't at peace.  It doesn't matter how clean the house is when bitterness is growing in the hearts of all your children...I needed to still want clean bathrooms, but not as much as I wanted peace at home."

OUCH!

I'm learning that my to-do lists are not bad, and not accomplishing everything on them doesn't make me a lazy or unfit mom.  The heart in which I accomplish them is the key.  I want organized closets, but not as much as kids that have been shown and guided to share and respect their toys/belongings.  I want healthy, balanced meals, but not more than healthy, balanced relationships between the Colony.  I need to prioritize my priority list:)

"7" - I Hate Too Much Stuff

I don't really even know where to begin with this one.  I literally read it in 5 days.  It is an easy, funny read.  Jen's sense of humor and wit is hi.lar.i.ous but her honesty and transparency are what hit so very close to home for me.  Her disgust in the excess and inner battle with the American dream.

I've written about the fight our family is giving the  American culture and the machine of materialism, but man, how quickly it sneaks in and shifts perspective back!

This book was a great perspective shifter.  A reminder that life can, and WILL, go on without the latest fashions lining my closet or the newest gadgets sitting on my mantel or garage or the update statuses for the quick "I-hope-I-get-more-likes" fix, or the "what-else-can-we-put-on-the-calendar" mentality.

Even before I began reading I didn't want to just copy what the Hatmaker family did.  There's no way I'd feel the exact same convictions that her family did, but there is ALWAYS room for change and improvement, even if it is a temporary re-focus in a specific area.  So that was my prayer...that God would speak to and convict MY heart as I read this book, and soften MY heart to any areas that needed some tweaking.

The conclusion at the end of the book was actually my favorite thing.  She didn't leave me a list of to-do's (and ya'll KNOW how much I LOVE to-do lists!) that would ensure a "win" for the fight against this insanity, because quite honestly, they are still working out all the practical ways the Lord is working in their own family, but instead, gave a very easy analogy for me to grasp.  She compared this experiment to someone who is obese and in need of surgery.  They first must lose weight to get rid of the fat, in order to get the surgery that will change their life.  Doing this experiment, for their family, was the hard work of losing the weight, cutting through the fat, so God could reach the soft parts of their hearts, in order to really get to the vulnerable parts that need change.

I will tell you one thing that was utterly embarrassing for me to realize about myself:
I am NOT a shopper.  Anyone who knows me at all can attest to that:)  I pride myself in the purging that continually goes on my house (almost to a fault, actually), but while reading through "7" I was smacked in the face with something that I never even realized about myself.  Yes, I hate shopping.  Yes, I hate excess stuff sitting around unused.  Yes, I purge on a daily regular basis.  These are all fine and dandy, but the problem is that somehow I justify the replacement of it all!  I don't care if it was on sale (ooh, those gray towels are on sale and they will match better, so I'll get rid of the green ones that we've had for forever) or I liked THIS one because it matches or looks better (even though my first one does the job just fine), I am still spending money on something that I don't necessarily "need".  I have this compulsion to buy something, even if it is a coffee while I have a few minutes to myself, or a pack of gum at the "trap" station or the shirt on clearance that's ONLY $4.  Every single one of those items can really add up.  I'm not saying that "stuff" is bad.  God loves to bless his children with good gifts.  But when we frivolously spend more on ourselves than intentionally spending on the hurting and needy around us, then there is need for a perspective shift.  BTW, anyone who speaks to me between services on the weekends is VERY grateful for the pack of gum that made the cut, even if it wasn't on my list, ha, and would therefore be considered a "need":)

I don't believe I'll be doing another Facebook fast or anything, but there are some small changes I am implementing around the house, with my kids, and absolutely in my own life.