Teaching Your Kids To Be IN The World, But Not OF The World ~ KITW

“How do you love the sinner without loving the sin?”

Hasn’t this been the age-old question?

Our kids started out being homeschooled, but after some complications we decided to enroll 2 of our 5 kids into the public school that was practically in our backyard. We have been blown away with the support they have given our now 4 children who attend  their school. We are in consistent communication with all of their teachers and the special resources department has been better than we could have ever imagined for our special needs child.

But the decision to place our kids in the public school system has also opened up many other opportunities for discussion, and ministry, and service. We have been able to open up our home to classmates and their families. And we have been able to begin conversations about the very real world we live in. We’ve decided not to shelter our kids in this area. We are in it to get dirty for Christ and to shine brightly for Him!

But how in the world do you teach your children about the world without being judgmental of the world that tends to do things so differently from your family? {Read More...}

Spiritual "Gifts" ~ KITW

Christmas is one of those things I battle with almost all year long.

I am still working on finding a balance. After last year’s mandatory “gratitude experiment” I was very tempted to just forget about Christmas gifts all together! I was so done with the greed and the ungratefulness. I wanted my kids to “get” that Christmas was Jesus’ birthday and that we were going to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior and that that very fact should be enough to celebrate.

But then my husband brought me back down to reality. Reminding me that there is nothing wrong with gift giving, or receiving, for that matter, it’s all a matter of the heart and the heart is what we needed to work on and cultivate. Our kids needed to know what to expect and be grounded in the reality that giving can be such a gift in and of itself. I needed some way to be okay with loving on my kids through giving them gifts, but balancing it with proper focus.

So how do we do that?

{Read more...}

When Our Children "Depart From It" ~ KITW

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he shall not depart from it.”

Proverbs 22:6

I used to think this verse ensured that if I was a good enough parent and taught my kids how to read the Bible, how to pray to God, and the joy of serving in the local church body, they would be sure to have a solid relationship with our Heavenly Father. Even if they made bad choices for a time, they were going to come back, just like the prodigal son, because that is the promise of this verse in Proverbs.

But now…now I’ve lived, and seen, and heard, and witnessed enough heartache to last a lifetime of parents grieving the waywardness of their children and their unwise choices.

The purpose of the book of Proverbs is to teach knowledge and wisdom. The verses within this book are full of advice for everyone, in all stages of life, on how to live a fulfilled and Christ-centered life.

But all the wisdom and knowledge in the world will never negate the free will that God has given us.

He wants us to choose Him.

But the fact of the matter is, not everyone will... { Read More }

Stopping The Drama Train In Its Tracks ~ KITW

We, as women, are way more prone to drama. We just are. God has made us with super big hearts, with super big feelings, that read into relationships…and conversations and actions and looks and body language…am I right or am I right?

As much as I pride myself on trying to stay drama-free, I must admit that I fall prey to these exact same actions.

I used to be a pro at adding hidden agendas into conversations that I would have with other women/friends. I would make up alternate realities about how they really felt about me and my family, or my parenting techniques, or why my daughter didn’t get invited to their daughter’s party, or why nobody ever wanted to meet at my house. I had it ALL figured out.

But in all honesty, they had NEVER communicated ANY of the things that I was hypothetically conjuring up in my mind as fact. Sure, some of my suspicions may have been spot on, but was that solid truth I was relying on, or insecure feelings of rejection and hurt?

Josh, my husband, is absolutely baffled by the way women (and little girls) handle situations.

Here is just one example: ... [Read More]

3 Ways To Weigh Ministry Opportunities ~ KITW

I feel something BIG happening in the church as a whole right now.

I am seeing more and more of the beautiful balance of worshipping and filling up on the weekend within the corporate worship setting in order to pour ourselves out throughout the week. Giving and serving and loving the ones God has surrounded us with at work, home, and other activities, as we tangibly point others to Christ.

It’s as if there is an intentional shift. A driven focus.

And I don’t think it’s just our church or area. I have heard of churches all over the world making this shift from the gluttonous, self-centered worship that has unfortunately infected many of our churches. And I am proud to be a part of one of the churches fighting this trend.

But along with this outward focus can come feelings of exhaustion and burn out. Overwhelmed feelings with the amount of work that still needs to be done. Difficulty saying “no” to a good opportunity to serve in order to keep your priorities in check.

How can we figure out how to live life on mission while still protecting the much-needed white space we, and our family, need. A more pointed question for this audience–how can we best fulfill our responsibility to make disciples and love our neighbors while continuing to pour into the mission field within the four walls of our own home?

There are three questions I ask myself before saying “yes” to a good outside serving opportunity:

{Read More...}

Spear In One Hand, Tool In The Other ~ KITW

Have you ever read the account in Nehemiah when he rebuilt the wall around Jerusalem?

If not, go read it right HERE. It may take a while to get the full context, but it’s totally worth it!

Several weeks ago at Journey, my home church, Pastor Jimmy taught through this particular story. I have read this account several other times, but something jumped off the pages this time around as our Pastor began to dive into the emotion and persistent actions Nehemiah took through his relentless obedience to God.

Nehemiah was given a task and he not only obeyed with a happy heart, but he obeyed in the midst of constant ridicule and threats. But he felt SO deeply that this was God’s will for him during this season of his life that he fought through the difficulty to complete his task.

These particular verses are what really caught my eye: {read more...}

Dare To Be Different: A lesson in confidence ~ KITW

The other day my oldest daughter, Areyna, came home from school with a pretty long face. I could tell that something was wrong but I couldn’t quite put my finger on what area of her life was being affected simply by looking at her body language.

I quickly began running through the list of questions in the “Mommy Guide Book” that every mother to preteen girls receives when their little girl becomes a tween and…wait, I still haven’t gotten mine! Have you?

I really think we mamas should get shipments with tools and guidebooks to help us get through major life adjustments and seasons, don’t you? I mean really, what mom couldn’t benefit from one of those light thingies you put in little ears...[Read More]

Remember The Hard Stuff To Give Hope For The Future Stuff ~ KITW

Isn’t it funny how certain smells and tastes, and even songs, can take us back to a certain time in our lives?

For my husband it is the scent of Bath ‘n Body Works “Sweet Pea” lotion that brings him back to our wedding day and honeymoon. Certain songs bring me back to soccer field warm-ups in college or high school trips to the beach when I lived in Charleston, SC.

This past week I was spending some time with my mom after she had undergone a procedure for breast cancer. I would wake up in the mornings to join my dad on their screened-in back porch, coffee in hand, windows open, listening to the birds and other critters in the surrounding fields and pastures. Every couple of minutes a rooster would crow and EVERY SINGLE TIME it would rush me back... [Read More]

Teaching The Lifestyle Of Ceaseless Prayer ~ KITW

I’m pretty sure I’m not alone when I say that the word “prayer” can be a bit daunting and overwhelming.

We know that God commands it.
We know that He hears it.
We know it is a simple conversation between God and His children.

But something about it can seem so hard to grasp.

And then we read the command to “pray without ceasing” and we wonder if it is even attainable!

How in the world do we pray without ceasing?

I wrote a post a few years back about how I stopped saying “amen” ...{Read more...}

If You Love Me Then Prove It ~ KITW

When people first fall in love it is usually because of a multitude of things, but one of them is for sure because of the actions of the person they are falling in love with.

I love to HEAR my husband and kids tell me they love me, but there is just something about the actions that are the overflow from that love. On the other hand, if I don’t SEE any actions or fruit from those words I could easily begin to question those words.

Each of my kids have gone through an “I love you” phase. It is really cute. I remember when Areyna...{Read more}

Book Worm

I am in the middle of several books again.
No, I don't have time to read each of them everyday, and thankfully some of them are with groups so I only need to read 1 chapter a week, but man is my brain taking in a lot these days!

I thought I'd share the good reads I'm in the middle of for those of you looking for something to inspire.

"Spirit Hunger" by Gari Meacham.
This book came at just the right time and is chalk full of life altering perspective on the power of the Holy Spirit and our response to Him.

"Hands Free Mama" by Rachel Macy Stafford
I'm reading through this one with my Squad.  In an effort to live in the moment, while still living a "relevant" life, we chose this book to help us balance it all.  It has been EXCELLENT so far.  I love how it isn't "anti-devices" or social media, but helps us gain an eternal perspective for the real-live people right in front of us as we put healthy boundaries in place for everything else.

"Give Them Grace" by Elyse Fitzpatrick and Jessica Thompson
I can't rave enough about this one.  OK, well I have only just begun reading, but it had me hooked by the time I finished the forward and introduction!  I am reading this along with my co-writers over at KITW.  The writers graciously tear the vail between moral behavior and Christ-focused heart-change. I don't know about you, but I don't want an outwardly obedient child who rejects Jesus inwardly.  I want to flood them with the awareness of God's grace as it infiltrates my own life and then let it wash over the way I parent.

I will be writing on Chapters 4 and 9.  So make sure you go grab your copy and jump into the discussion!

Put Your Phone Down - 5 Ways To Keep Your Family The Priority ~ KITW

This post is a follow-up to my previous post about passing judgement. One of the main examples in that post was of a mother on her phone at the playground instead of engaging with her children. I offered some reasons as to why this may have happened based on my own personal experience.

I believe there is a time and a place for electronics, especially in this technologically growing generation we live in. I realized just how much I used my computer a couple of years ago.

I gave up my computer for a week during lent. Not even one day into the “fast” I realized... {Read more}

Teaching Our Children NOT To Be Consumers ~ KITW

Last fall, my husband, Josh, and I had had enough!

Enough of the greediness and the ugly words that tend to follow, like “mine,” “more,” and “now.”

The current holiday season wasn’t helping our ache for contentment within our family. The plea for Christmas lists and constant gift exchanges among friends was just growing the want for more wants.

After one particularly greedy incident that occurred at the Dollar Store we came up with a plan that had been stirring in our hearts for quite some time.

It was a plan to restart our family focus...{Read More}

Everything Else Is Just Overflow ~ KITW

We all have busy lives.

Believe me, I know.

I am a mama to 5 little humans. Real live humans, who require constant help with tying shoes, washing hair, packing lunches, and the never-ending task of helping with homework and projects (and taking LEGO pieces apart).

I am also a wife to a man in ministry at a church, getting his doctorate in seminary, as well as taking his music on the road. Not to mention my own musical endeavors and side business making jewelry. We are a family with a full schedule, no doubt.

But that doesn’t negate the fact that I have a real need for a personal, DAILY relationship with Christ. {...Read More}

Learning To Be Flexible With Your Family Devotional Plans - KITW

When I was younger I remember being fearful of heaven. I knew it would be beautiful and I knew I’d get to be with Jesus forever, but how in the world are we, as little humans (or even big ones for that matter), supposed to grasp the concept of FOREVER? It’s downright overwhelming if you think about it.

If given the choice, I think I would have rather stayed in my happy little bubble of familiarity. I had Cinnamon (my loving teddy bear), my mommy and daddy under one roof, and a brother and sister who gave me just enough grief ;). I knew nothing different and [Read more...]

Become A Missional Minded Family - KITW

Missions runs deep in our family.

Josh grew up as a Pastor’s Kid, but his father has since been a world-wide evangelist for nearly 20 years. In turn, Josh has traveled the world with his family, serving the Lord.

I grew up falling in love with the mission fields during our yearly Missions Emphasis Sundays at church. Then, several years ago my parents became one of those families through Equip International.

Josh and I have been on several short-term mission trips together since being married. And then, of course, was our stint living in Uganda as we worked on our adoption. I’m pretty sure Areyna would live in Africa if she were to be given that choice today. :)

But our family goes far beyond the traveling missionaries and short-term now...[Read More]

Making HIS Word the Last Word of the Day - KITW

It’s the beginning of the year.

2015

I can hardly believe it, even after writing it out.

If you are like me you spent the majority of December re-evaluating what worked and didn’t work in 2014 as well as praying about what the Lord wants to teach you through a renewed resolution to live for Him.

But I’m not one to make a long list of things I want to change anymore. I love lists more than the average person (obsessed is a better word, ha!), but over the past few years I began to see a pattern in my New Year’s Resolutions. The same things would be on my list year after year, until about 3 years ago...[Read More]

How To Determine the BEST consequences for your kids ~ KITW

I am the worst at spurting off a consequence for a particular offense before thinking all the way through it.

For example, yesterday my highly emotional 8-year-old was having a very anxious morning. I mean a R-E-A-L-L-Y tough morning.

At some point during the morning he had gained full control over the step-stool from the kitchen and was carrying it around so nobody else could use it. Not that anybody else truly NEEDED to use it, but seeing as it was deemed “untouchable” by all but said 8-year-old, the war was on!

Enter mom...[Read More...]

How To Make The Choice To Homeschool Or Not ~ KITW

I grew up as a teacher’s kid. I have such fond memories of roaming the school hallways early in the mornings, pinning bulletin boards for my mom, grading papers at night, and cutting out laminated items for hours. I loved it.

So naturally, when my husband (Josh) and I got married, I envisioned waving to my future children as they climbed on the school bus to head to school.

[Read More...]

Getting Back To The Basics Of Parenting ~ KITW

I'm back over at KidsInTheWord today with a post about our role as the mama.

I think a lot of times we, as parents, make parenting more difficult than it needs to be.

Hear me out.

I’m not saying that parenting isn’t difficult. I’m not saying that it won’t stretch you to a point where you feel like you may break. I’m not even saying that there’s a quick answer to each battle of the wills or hardened heart.

I’m not saying that at all!

Nor am I saying that I am an advocate for UNparenting. I am nowhere NEAR that way of thinking! But I’m going to let you in on a little secret...[Read More]