#MayviaInUG ~ Part 2

~Make sure to read Part 1 of the adventure HERE~

The night had arrived for Mayvia to make their appearance to the girl named Kelly.

The husband (who calls himself Smooth) had his documentation apparatus (we call this an iPhone camera) in hand while the girl we call Kelly looked on in curiosity to see just who this Mayvia really was.

As soon as the girls called Heidi and Tasha (or Mayvia...geesh, this blog is getting kind of difficult to write, ha!) took the first step out of the carriage pick up (yup, it's still the airport) they barely made eye contact with the girl called Kelly before the tears began spilling down each of their faces.  But then, without any warning, the girl called Kelly quickly covered her face, walked right past them,  refusing to make eye contact, and waved the girls called Heidi and Tasha to follow her away from the entrance where everyone was looking at these crazy women who are NOT locals (they like to call us Muzungus".  Don't worry, it's not offensive.)

After gathering their composure, and luggage, they made their way to a nearby Inn (which actually is called Two Friends.  It was BEAUTIFUL!) to rest for the night.

The entourage of giddy, emotional girlfriends we call Kelly, Heidi and Tasha (along with the husband that calls himself Smooth) hopped in the carriage (we will now call a carriage a car) and made the long trek to the distant place that the girl called Kelly, moved to (in Africa).

One very awesome surprise that the Heavenly Father orchestrated is that Mayvia's arrival just so happened to fall just days before the long-awaited court date of sweet Chloe Laiti.  This is the very reason the girl called Kelly decided that moving to a distant land (called Africa) was going to be oh-so-difficult, but exactly what the Lord had planned for her life.  Her story.

Mayvia (do you mind if we just refer to the girls we call Heidi and Tasha as the joint Mayvia?  It's so much quicker to type.  Okay, thanks!) had no time for Jet lag as they jumped into Nanny/Auntie role to get this court hearing underway with as little stress as possible.  For they were put in charge of the girl called Kelly's ( and the husband who calls himself Smooth) small tribe of girls.  Five to be exact.

Mayvia had some personal past experience with Court in such a distant land as this, so were prepared for the long day ahead.  First things first, we had to get all fancy for the judge.  He likes to see families who are put together.

Cana, Tasha, and Kayil waiting to head to Kampala

Then we all packed into the Attorney's office to prep for the day.

The husband who calls himself Smooth explaining what court will look like to the girls.

Heidi beginning project "keep Kaliyah happy"

We finally made it to the outer room of the courthouse where we set up shop for the day.  This is where many hairdo's were done, and more-than-I-can-count card games were played.

This girl called Kaliyah, will NEVER be bored with all the mamas around her to keep her happy!

After what seemed like HOURS...wait, it actually WAS hours.  TEN hours to be exact, of waiting, waiting, and waiting, the family was called back to the Judge's quarters.

Mayvia began immediately praying for favor and that the Judge would be compassionate for their long wait and actually hear them.

Not 15 minutes later the family began filing out of the Judge's quarters with very solemn looks on their faces.  They had been told that it was too late and that they would try again tomorrow.

Now, 10 hours sounds like a long day for you, I'm sure.  But have you ever just sat, waiting in anticipation of a  potentially stressful situation for ten hours?  With 5 small girls?

The girl called Kelly and the husband who calls himself Smooth held it together, gathered the large crew and headed to find some sustenance and any kind of Inn that would be open upon such late notice.

We all went to bed that night with very sad, tired hearts (and slept in our contacts and the clothes we'd been wearing all day since this was certainly not planned or expected.  But getting ready time was cut in 1/2.  Actually, climbing out of bed and rubbing the fog off my contacts pretty much did the trick.)

But praise the Lord for new beginnings.  And new days.  And sunshine.

Day 2 of court.  Looking a little less put together and a LOT more exhausted and warn out.

And STROLLERS that push a fussy baby around so you don't have to carry her for hours at a time (I'm pretty sure my biceps grew an inch on each arm after that 48 hours!).

Then, around 1:30pm this family was called back to the Judge's quarters again.  Over two hours later they came out with great rejoicing from a very positive hearing with a very compassionate judge.

We decided to celebrate before heading back home and made an adventure to a nearby mall to eat dinner and visit the brown-skinned Santa in his hut.  Because this is what Christmas looks like in a distant land (called Africa).

What an adventure Mayvia had already had.

But wait, it had just begun!

{TO BE CONTINUED...}

#MayviaInUG ~ Part 1

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, were 3 girlfriends whom we will call Kelly, Heidi and Tasha.

The one we call Kelly had to move to a distant land (that term is fancy for what we like to call Africa) with her family to raise her children for a time while the other two stayed in their own native land to raise their own native children.

The friend we call Kelly, who moved far away, had done exceedingly well adjusting to life in this foreign country, but was in dire need of some companionship and encouragement.  So her husband called the other husbands and devised a plan.

The husbands brought their grand scheme to the ones we call Heidi and Tasha and they got to work.  They searched far and wide to find the perfect mode of transportation (this is what we like to refer to as - the cheapest plane tickets they could find) to this distant land (we call Africa) where the one we call Kelly lived.

After their far and wide search they found the resources they needed to get to the one we call Kelly.
But it was nearly TWO MONTHS AWAY.

So the ones we call Heidi and Tasha stored up these things in their hearts and told no one of their great adventure.  They didn't even mention the words with each other, in fear that the surprise would be more than they could handle and wind would get to the one we call Kelly, and the surprise would not be.

But after some time (let's just say it was several weeks) some encouragement (some would refer to it as, ahem, badgering) from the husbands made the trip a little more real and the girls thought it was time to begin checking the legal paperwork (a thing we call a passport) and all other important things one needs to take care of while taking a journey to this particular distant land (called Africa).  All while making as little mention of the task at hand as possible.

And then, all of a sudden, the time came for them to pack their bags and mentally prepare for the journey ahead (we like to call this - the night before the flight, after the family gathering at church called Jingle Jam.  We also like to call this procrastination due to fear of excitement overload!).

The girls we call Heidi and Tasha, told only their closest of kin (the other girlfriends were like, "what the $@%$?!".  You're leaving like, TOMORROW?!  As Heidi and Tasha apologized profusely for keeping such a nasty little secret.)  before boarding the carriage (er, uh, the plane) to the distant land (called Africa).

After saying their farewells, and given strict instructions to be "wise and smart" (thank you loving husband I call Josh) as we weave in and out of transportation venues (we like to call these international terminals.  Places of which Heidi and Tasha had never ventured on their own, and the husbands clearly did not believe they were ever going to make it to their destination, ha!), they boarded the carriage (we still call it an airplane) and began their cross-country journey to the friend they call Kelly, to the distant land (we call Africa).

They wanted to document their adventure but had limited means to do so (we like to call this - selfies for days because we had been given strict instructions to be "safe and wise" and, hello, asking a stranger to take your photo doesn't seem very "safe and wise".  There may or may not have also been some silly videos where we are whispering into the camera for fear that our dearest Kelly would hear us ALL THE WAY IN AFRICA?! But whatever.  Don't judge!  The suspense was almost more than we could handle, and we like to blame our lapse in common sense as part of that!)

Meanwhile, in the distant land (we call Africa) where the girl we call Kelly resided, her husband was creating his own plan to get her to the carriage pick up (also called an airport).  He cleverly blended the last names of the girls called Heidi and Tasha, which are Mayhugh and Via and began referring to  them as "Mayvia", a female, Asian missionary coming to help out the ministry over the holidays.

So, the girl we call Kelly, reluctantly accompanied her husband (who calls himself Smooth) so they could go pick up this Asian woman the girl we call Kelly thought was called Mayvia.

The girls we call Heidi and Tasha finally landed without a hitch, but the anticipation was practically more than they could bare.

"What will the girl we call Kelly do when she sees us?", they thought as they waited in line to finalize their entry documentation (we call this an entry VISA.  It is a line you are supposed to stand very quietly in so that you can prove that you mean no harm to the residents of the country you are wanting to enter.  But the giddiness completely took over and the smiles were no longer able to be disguised.)

you are also NOT supposed to take photos in the airport
(this part may not have been so smart and wise;)

The girls we call Heidi and Tasha had finally ARRIVED!

{TO BE CONTINUED...}

Christmas (2015) In January

This is the first time in my LIFE that a Christmas letter hasn't gone out on behalf of my family!
Like, no card with a family photo.
No written family update.
Nothing.

I feel like I have just broken some kind of unsaid once-you-have-a-family-of-your-own-you-absolutely-must-get-your-entire-(happy/sad/mad/unruly/matchy match/unmatchy match-family-together-for-a-photo-and-then-send-it-to-everyone-you-know-by-snail-mail-or-else-you-are-not-qualified-to-be-a-real-American-family rule.

It just didn't happen this year, though.

(And we even had all the pictures taken and sitting on my desktop!!!)

(And it wasn't like this year was even THAT crazy.  I mean, we got a Christmas card out the year we were in Uganda for our adoption, but for some reason I couldn't pull myself together in 2015?!)

But, whatever man!

You have all survived and are engrossed in your 2016 just fine without a photo of our family hanging on your refrigerator.

But...because we had the photo, and I think our fantastic photographer (thanks Jenn!) managed to get our family to look particularly stunning, I thought I'd share:)

And because I can (and because I didn't), here is an update on each of the Colony members just for fun.

As I write this post, Josh is finishing up his LAST day of his LAST seminar for his Doctorate.  He is nowhere near complete (the writing will now begin) but the classroom time will be complete!  And the family will ALL be rejoicing!!!!! He is doing a fantastic job as the worship pastor at a church we love and is becoming such a wonderful leader in his area.

I, Tasha, stay at home with Jude.  We keep ourselves busy during the day while the other kids are away at school with house projects (for both my home and other's), creating jewelry and teaching others how oils have transformed their lives, and doing normal things that mamas do.

Areyna is in 5th grade.  She is doing very well in school and I can't believe she is going into middle school next year!  Speaking of middle school, she will be joining me and Jude at home next year as we dive into 6th grade together.  A preschooler and a 6th grader to homeschool...it should be fun.  Honestly.  I am really looking forward to it.  This year Rainy has mastered several recipes in the kitchen, my favorite are her molasses cookies.  She also brings Sunday night pancakes to the table all on her own.  And the thing I love most is that she will allow 1-2 helpers in the kitchen with her and teaches them how to cook (which is more than I can say about myself.  I hate sticky, floury messes, ok!)

Zeke is plugging right along in 2nd grade.  He is still just as active and creative as ever.  He is really blossoming in his role as big brother as he reads to Jude and tries to "teach" the littles new concepts.  And his broken arm is nearly 100% healed, PTL!

Alethia is thriving in her 1st grade class and is my only child who never complains about going to school.  2016 is going to be the year she masters common sense along with book knowledge, I just know it;).  Her loves are the same (playing with horses, barbies, her siblings and being a mommy to Jude:).

Cai is our daredevil.  I can hardly watch as he rides his scooter off of boulders, climbs to the highest un-climbable point on a play set or makes an obstacle course out of our home furniture.  He has nearly given me heart failure a handful of times as I quietly stand with all the other moms on the playground looking for this kid's mom, because who would EVER allow her child to play like this!  He is doing great in 1st grade and learns concepts very quickly.  He is super creative when it comes to building things.

Jude. Oh Jude.  I really don't want to get into it all on the blog because you know, one day he might read how "spirited" he is.  Okay, so maybe it could benefit him and when he stumbles upon this post he'll send me flowers of apology for how "spirited" he was, ha!  He is completely and utterly defiant and disobedient one minute and then turn around to love on me and tell me he is going to "obey and give lots of kisses" the next.  He will be a great leader one day.  ONE. DAY.  As in, NOT today.  Not tomorrow, or anytime soon!  I love to snuggle and cuddle this boy.  He is such a joy to be around when he is compliant to direction and correction...sigh...he keeps me on my toes for sure, ha!

"And the Colony Ladies", you ask?  Well, our 6 lovelies are doing just fabulous and giving us a steady 6 eggs a day which has helped our grocery budget and protein intake.  So thank you ladies, for a job well done!

So there you have it!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from the Via Colony!!!

Teaching Your Kids To Be IN The World, But Not OF The World ~ KITW

“How do you love the sinner without loving the sin?”

Hasn’t this been the age-old question?

Our kids started out being homeschooled, but after some complications we decided to enroll 2 of our 5 kids into the public school that was practically in our backyard. We have been blown away with the support they have given our now 4 children who attend  their school. We are in consistent communication with all of their teachers and the special resources department has been better than we could have ever imagined for our special needs child.

But the decision to place our kids in the public school system has also opened up many other opportunities for discussion, and ministry, and service. We have been able to open up our home to classmates and their families. And we have been able to begin conversations about the very real world we live in. We’ve decided not to shelter our kids in this area. We are in it to get dirty for Christ and to shine brightly for Him!

But how in the world do you teach your children about the world without being judgmental of the world that tends to do things so differently from your family? {Read More...}

7 Years. 4 Years. Forever.

Well, since I am just now beginning to play catch up on my blog I thought I'd start at the huge milestone that took place in November.

Althea turned seven years old.

Again, continuing to disobey our orders to stay small.
I always say that, but I really don't mind my kids getting older, because you can see how far they have come.

Especially this once timid, scared, uncertain little girl.
She now knows no stranger.
She is softening up to animals.  We all rejoice together when she sees a dog enter a room and doesn't scream in terror, or climb up Uncle Craig's back (the highest point in the room, ha!).  She has even been known to catch a critter or two and has gone to get the eggs from the chickens (with a chaperon of course).
She is THRIVING in school.
She is beginning to learn to face her fears and emotions instead of running from them.
She is working on confronting her hurt feelings instead of getting defensive (something I am learning right along WITH her, can I get an amen?!)

She still loves babies and Barbies.
She still loves learning new games.
She still loves to be the queen bee around the imagination circles.
She still squeals with delight whenever her daddy's car is seen pulling into the driveway.

Her favorite thing of all time is horses.
And since we are not going to be adding a horse to our Colony anytime soon she decided that having a pony themed birthday party would suffice.

I'm admittedly the WORST mom when it comes to birthday parties.
And throw the word "THEME" in there and I don't even make the list.

But this time I would say that I did a pretty good job:)
Except that I can't find half the pictures.  Like the ones of Laity with her friends and their adorable paintings.  But we're documenting what we've got anyway!

We invited just a handful of her favorite girls.

We ate a table full of snacks.

And we painted cute little duct tape name creations.  Too bad SOMEONE can't find those photos because I was pretty impressed with the outcome!  (These were originally going to be horse silhouettes but it didn't quite work the way I had hoped.  But whatever.)

And played games.

I think everyone had fun, including me:)

Now as I look back, just one day past 4 YEARS since Alethia stepped out onto American soil I can't help but be thankful for all that the Lord has done in our family with and THROUGH our Alethia Grace.

Our Truth and Grace.

Alethia,
Mommy and daddy are so grateful that God chose to place you in our family!  I pray that I will be a better mommy this year than last and that we can grow together as we both grow older.  I am so proud of the young lady you are becoming and pray that you will forever seek the heart of our great God!
Love, 
Mom

Defending The Church I Love

I have this incessant need to explain myself.

When there seems to be some kind of injustice to my character or misunderstood intentions behind words or actions, I feel like it needs to be corrected.

But today isn't about me!
Actually, in part, it is.
And if you are a follower of the Lord Jesus Christ, then you are part of it too!

You and me, we make up the church.

We all "do church" differently.
Different denominations.
Different philosophies of ministry.
Different genres.
Different musical styles.
Different preaching techniques.

Church can look so very different.
Yet we are all part of the same body.
The same imperfect, messy, grace-needing body.

And our body is called The Church.

Today I feel this burdening need to defend the church.
The church I love.

Let me go ahead and "explain myself" right here.
I have been in church my whole life.
I have been a staff wife nearly the entirety of my marriage.
So I KNOW there is no perfect church to attend.
There is no perfect church staff.
There are no perfect church attenders.
And I would even go as far as to say that I KNOW that individuals in the church can be the cause of hurt.  Very deep hurt has come from the body of Christ.  It is unfortunate, but true.

But, no church will ever be exactly what you need.
Because what you need is JESUS.

I feel like there is this unrealistic expectation that has been placed on church staff.
As if the pastors in the church have some kind of "in" with the Heavenly Father that the rest of us don't have.

Here is an example:

You have been going through a tough season.  Whether it involves family, finances, marriage, kids, or job.  Whatever it is, it has been very difficult.

And somewhere in the middle of the hurt and chaos of your life you begin to have these feelings of neglect from the church.  You begin to question whether the church has done its job to walk alongside you.  You begin to feel resentful for their lack of participation.

Your feelings are raw and you have been made very vulnerable.
And out of that is where I believe the root of these accusations have begun.

Here is where I feel the need to explain.

My first question to you is this...
Are you involved in a smaller group of believers who are DOING LIFE with you?

If not, then that is your first problem.  You have neglected to see the importance of doing life with other believers.  You are disconnected from the CHURCH.  The BODY.  Just attending a church will not get you the support you will need as you wade through really hard life seasons.  The pastors in your church are definitely qualified (and called) to listen and pray for you and send you in the right direction for healing (i.e. counselor, therapist, other individuals or families who may be better equipped to walk through this particular season with you), but it is unrealistic to think they can be everything to everybody.

The people you do life with aren't just intended to be the hands and feet of Jesus to the lost in the realms of where they live, but to you and to me, other believers.  We work together to build each other up so that we can take that love out to the lost.  It takes some work on your part to find "your people", but so worth it to feel connected to the church!

Okay, so what if you ARE involved in this kind of group?
Then you need to be able to be completely honest and vulnerable with them.  Utilize the group that the Lord has placed around you.  Allow them to get into the messy areas of this situation so that they can pray and encourage you.  And in return you will be lending a hand into their own growing faith as they walk with you!

Here's where it gets a little sticky.

I think a large majority of church attendees who use this statement, "The church hasn't been there for me as I go through ___________" is actually saying that the individual believers who they have surrounded themselves with (who have cried with them, encouraged them, walked with them every step of the way) are less important to the body as the people who work in the church.

When did the Pastor and church staff have to be the only ones to carry the burden of the entire born again population?  That mentality is setting the church up for failure.  It is setting the church staff up for being burned out.  And setting yourself up for a lifetime of discontentment with the church and resentment toward church staff.

What about the people who you go up to after the service and and pray with?  This puts the ball in your court.  Are you making the effort to allow this area of the church to walk through this difficult time with you?  Have you taken advantage of those who are called to pray over us?  Do you feel less heard by God unless you are prayed over by the lead pastor or Elder?  Are the others on the prayer team any less "effective" in their prayer and sincerity?

It's a shift in thinking.  Do you see the effort it takes on both parts?

When a pastor meets with you and sends you on to a counselor or therapist, the church people shift, but the church is still being the church.
When a pastor passes your situation onto another individual or family who could better walk through this with you, the people walking through the situation with you shifts, but the church is still being church.

(This isn't even considering the other individuals who assume that the pastors are just supposed to know what's going on in their lives without going to them!)

If you are feeling neglected by the church just because the handful of pastors on staff at your church are not personally involved in your situation then, I'm sorry to say, it is going to be very difficult for you to ever be content at a church.

You are neglecting to see the multitudes that the pastors ARE personally reaching.
You are neglecting to see the church already around you, in a position to pour into you each and every day.

Just because someone is on staff at a church doesn't mean that they are in closer proximity to the healing power of the Holy Spirit or ear of the Heavenly Father.

So before you discredit the church and it's activity in your circumstance take a good look at the people who you have surrounded yourself with.  Are YOU taking advantage of the people who the church has set up to help you wade through a difficult season?  Who is the body of Christ who is speaking into you during this season?

Acknowledge these people as the active part of the church and the body of Christ that they are and thank God for the church he has placed around you.

THESE, my friends, are church goers BEING the church.
the dedicated prayer team
the friend who texts you to keep in touch and updated, letting you know he's praying for you
the small group of moms who have poured into prayer for you as you get through this
the family who brought you a meal
the encouraging friends who speak truth in love
the stranger from the outreach team who visited you in the hospital

Investing in you.
Walking through your difficult season WITH you and encouraging you every step of the way.

________________________

I am not the only one who has noted this unrealistic expectation of church staff.

Everyone needs to go read Jen Hatmaker's, For The Love.

Her chapter on the church was exactly what I'm talking about!

Another book that touches on this is actually one Josh read for his class a few weeks ago.

Growing Up by Robby Gallaty

The Game Called Ketchup

In soccer we played a game called ketchup.  I'm pretty sure that it should be spelled "Catch up", because the whole goal of the game was to catch up to the person in front of you, but whatever.

Here is how you play.

Everyone would line up at one corner of the field.
One person would start jogging the length of the first side of the field.
As soon as they turn the corner they would sprint the shorter width of the field until they would round the corner to the other longer length of the field and begin jogging again and end in a sprint as they rounded the last corner.

As soon as they turned the first corner for the sprint the next person in line behind them would begin jogging that first line and so the line would just keep going.

But here's the catch of the game, the people behind you had a chance to "catch up" with you.  If they caught you they could be done after their first round of the field.  If you got caught up with you had to do another round until you could make it all the way around without someone catching up with you.

I explain this game because this is kind of what my blog will be looking like over the next several posts.  I feel like my blog is still in November of 2015 but I am personally here in the first week of January 2016.

I have a lot of catching up to do.
So much has happened.
Some posts will be full of details as I jog down the long lines of the field.
Others are going to be sprinted past because they won't take as much time.

So lace up your cleats and lets go for a run!

Words Worth Remembering ~ Christmas Edition #ThingsTheySay

Cai:"Hey! I thought we were watching the Graham Cracker!  Who changed the channel?!"
(he actually meant "The Nutcracker")

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Me:"Jude, don't open that present.  That one's not yours."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Josh:"Jude, do you have another piece of gum?  I thought you said you weren't going to eat any more of it?  We already brushed our teeth."
Jude:"Oh yeah!  Ooooohhh, sorry dad!  I was just tempted to eat just one more piece!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(after being sent to his room to reevaluate his attitude)
Jude:"Mom, can I come out now?"
Mom:"Nope.  You have 5 minutes to go back to your room and think about your rude words."
Jude walking back to his room, puts his finger up to his head as if thinking and says..."hmmmm".
Then he comes running down the hallway saying, "MOM!  I thought of a word!  I can play with MY cars and Cai can play with HIS cars!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Josh:"Jude, buddy, that present isn't yours!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Zeke:"Mom, it's like a dream day cuz we got this dream car!"

They have only been asking for one of these for 7 years:-)
They don't even care that we had to ghetto rig the back on, ha!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jude:"Thanks for this stuff. What is it?"
Rainy:"Jude!  That is mom's perfume that I gave her!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jude:"Here mom, this is yours.  I got it for you.  It's fingernail polish.  Can I open it for you?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Jude:"Here mom, this is a book for you and daddy and I'm giving it to you."
Me:"Thanks buddy, but that is YOUR book that daddy and I gave to YOU!"
Jude:"Oooh, THANKS!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All Colony members to Jude:"Noooo, stop opening presents!  Those aren't yours!"
Jude (crossing his arms and pouting): "But I WANT to open more presents."

#ChristmasWithTheColony
#ColonyChristmas

Spiritual "Gifts" ~ KITW

Christmas is one of those things I battle with almost all year long.

I am still working on finding a balance. After last year’s mandatory “gratitude experiment” I was very tempted to just forget about Christmas gifts all together! I was so done with the greed and the ungratefulness. I wanted my kids to “get” that Christmas was Jesus’ birthday and that we were going to celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior and that that very fact should be enough to celebrate.

But then my husband brought me back down to reality. Reminding me that there is nothing wrong with gift giving, or receiving, for that matter, it’s all a matter of the heart and the heart is what we needed to work on and cultivate. Our kids needed to know what to expect and be grounded in the reality that giving can be such a gift in and of itself. I needed some way to be okay with loving on my kids through giving them gifts, but balancing it with proper focus.

So how do we do that?

{Read more...}