Monday, September 28, 2009

I Got An "F"

I am reading a book by Jeremy Kingsley called, Be Last: Descending to Greatness.  It is a great read so far.  I finished up the first chapter last week about descending and becoming a servant and man was I convicted.  Here's the gist of the book...

"In a world where people are driven tirelessly
by the "me first" mentality, Jesus challenges
us to descend to TRUE greatness."
Humility + Service = Greatness

I've realized just how selfish, impatient and self-centered I truly am.  It is a very humbling book.  I have really been asking God to search me and show me any selfish way in me to work on and to show me areas where I can be a servant...and wouldn't you know He started showing me right away!

I had had a long day with the kids. Josh was out of town.  I had finally gotten Rainy and Zeke in bed and laid Micaiah down after feeding him.  I was half-way in the shower when there was a knock on the door.  I wanted desperately to be done with the day and mindlessly retire to the couch to get caught up on blogs, and other fun stuff like that, after a nice HOT shower, since those are coming few and far between these days=)

But instead I felt a heavenly nudge to go get the door, so I pulled myself together but it was not with a "happy heart" like I so often instruct my own children to do.  I opened the door to a dear lady friend who clearly needed to talk to someone and if you only knew this lady you'd know that it would mean the world to her for me to stop whatever I was doing and sit and talk with her.

But that isn't what I did, inside anyway.  I stood there with a bad attitude trying to smile through my teeth and act interested in what she was saying.  She'll never know the difference.  I put on a good front.  But is that what God had led me to the door to do?  No, he has called me to think of others first and to put other's needs ahead of my own.  What had I JUST read about for crying out loud?!

The whole time we were standing there talking all I could think about was ending the conversation and getting my much-needed (wanted) shower.  

As soon as she left I did get my shower...and a flood of emotions that came with the realization that I had just failed my first test.  I was just as selfish as I'd been convicted of earlier that day.  I pray that the next time I have a God-given appointment that I will grab a hold of it and run.  That's the example that Jesus showed us all throughout the Bible.  And I promise that if you come up to talk to me I will genuinely pay attention to you and NOT stand there thinking about my shower that I missed (again);)

You can check out this blog post I read the very next day about interruptions in our day.  Sometimes those are God-given appointments that are well-worth the interruption.
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