Thursday, May 26, 2011

I Walk The Line

I know that this will come as a shock to many of you but I feel the need to clarify.  (I know, I know, this comes from my need to please others, and the need to be heard, and to be understood...and the need to simply inform.)

So, here goes.

I do have a filter for my posts!

I know I walk a very fine line, here on the 'ol blog.

What should I write about?  Will this reflect Christ's presence in my life?  Would Josh hate that picture I just put up of him?  Will my kids read this when they get older and still believe that their mother loved them?  By sharing this story am I just trying to capture an audience, or am I truly confessing for accountability's sake?  Could this post help someone, even though it makes me look like a fool?  Could I spare someone from making the same mistakes as a mother, wife, Christ-follower, that I have made?

These are all questions I ask myself every day when I write my posts.  I would never want my family to be offended by something I write on my blog, not now and not in the future.

In fact, Josh is my first filter.  If I am sharing something very personal I have him read through the post to filter anything that needs to be changed.  Hey, he's even asked me not to share completed posts before and I respect that.  I welcome that.  Besides, having a blog that my hubbie hates or detests is the last thing I want:)

I also have a "filter team".  I have asked two of my best friends to filter the things I have written.  They have complete freedom to honestly tell me if I should change the wording or delete a post all-together.

See, I do draw the line somewhere.

But...

I refuse to be just another blog that portrays the perfect American family who has it altogether.

First of all, being The Mom who has it altogether is one of my downfalls and I will not allow my blog to feed that desire of mine for how people view me.

I am a real mom with real problems with patience, self-control, and who wonders how in the world to reach the heart of my children more often than not.  I need time-outs and I lose my own marbles almost daily.

I am a real wife who struggles with selfishness, resentment at times, among many other things.

I am a real Christ-follower who questions God, gets behind in my Bible reading, doubts His timing, who willfully disobeys sometimes, knowing that the consequences are following right behind.

So, if you have come here to read cute little stories about our family and how awesome we are, you have come to the wrong place!

If you've come here to cry with me, hopefully get some ideas of how NOT to do things, see Christ at work in this nobody, see a totally vulnerable momma/wife, and catch a laugh at my expense...then WELCOME!

You better fasten your seat belts, because life here on earth can get bumpy!
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