We are in a stage right now with Areyna that, when I ask her to do something and she doesn't really like the idea she either starts to whine (which I CANNOT stand) or starts to throw a temper tantrum. We began to give her a "choice". Here is an example, starting after the temper tantrum has begun.
Me: "Areyna, can you please have some self-control and listen to mommy?"
Me: "You have a choice. You can either choose to stop playing with your toys like mommy just asked you to with a happy heart and come enjoy a nice dinner...OR...You can choose to continue to throw a temper tantrum and choose to disobey mommy and choose consequences. Now, what choice would you like to make?"
Areyna: with a surprisingly much better attitude "I will choose to obey."
(This doesn't work EVERY time, but most of the time.)
In my quiet time today I finished up the book of 2 Samuel. I learned so much in this last chapter. The Lord had allowed Satan to tempt King David and he had a choice to make. David chose the WRONG choice, and his conscience let him know it. He was going to have to deal with the consequences. He went to the Lord and asked for forgiveness and for the Lord to take away his guilt. The Lord replied "This is what the Lord says: I am offering you three choices. Choose one of them, and I will do it to you." He had to choose his consequence. See, he ALREADY chose the path leading to consequences and now he had to choose which consequence he wanted from the Lord. We don't necessarily allow Areyna to choose her consequence, but hopefully by giving her options early on in her life, she will learn how to avoid that path all-together.